


Every Living Thing

by smalltowngirl24



Category: Carmilla (Web Series), Carmilla - All Media Types
Genre: AU, F/F
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-06-24
Updated: 2016-01-28
Packaged: 2018-04-05 21:48:40
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 21,874
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4196118
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/smalltowngirl24/pseuds/smalltowngirl24
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>AU set in Richmond, VA. Carmilla/Laura pairing. Dr. Carmilla Karnstein is a socially inept veterinarian and Laura Hollis is recovering from a rather messy break up. After an awkward encounter at a mutual friend's party, Laura is intrigued by the introverted Dr. Karnstein. Tracking her down to a horse rescue, Laura is determined to make the pair of them friends...or maybe more!</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. One

**Author's Note:**

> No copyright infringement intended. I do not have a beta so this story is raw. I apologize for any and all grammatical mistakes and errors. Enjoy.

* * *

**I.**

The horse lay deeply bedded in thick straw, her sides heaving with the strain of each contraction. Her soft black coat was slick with sweat, and every so often she moaned as another painful convulsion racked her body.

Laying beside it, elbow deep in mucus and muck, was a slight woman in her late twenties. From her position at the back end of the inky black mare, she couldn't shake the feeling that this was going to be a difficult delivery.

Plastic gloves were pulled up and over the woman's thin muscular arms, and they crinkled as she reached inside the mare's birth canal. There, with a twist of her arm, she felt two perfect forelegs and the tiny hooves that were softer than one would expect.

A cold wave of disappointment hit her as she felt the abrupt backward turn of the little foal's neck. It was turned around and and its head and neck were facing toward its hindquarters, causing the poor thing to be about as stuck as a cork in a bottle.

Even worse, most foals asphyxiated and died in this position if it was not remedied quickly and effectively.

"How's she doing, Dr. Karnstein?" asked an old man from his perch atop a three legged stool.

Dr. Carmilla Karnstein looked up from her work with a grimace, brushing back a dark brown curl behind one delicate ear with the curve of her shoulder before wrinkling her nose with worry. "Not too good, Abbot. I'm afraid the position of the foal is wrong. There is retention of the head and neck."

Abbot Normandy was a good man, a local farmer who relied on the few horses he kept to help run his family farm. Tractors were too new age, he often said, and the mare currently caught in the complicated delivery was one of his very favorite horses. He removed the old cloth cap from his head and ran his fingers over his mostly balding scalp before saying hoarsely, "What's that mean for her, Doc?"

"Well," Dr. Karnstein kept her voice business-like, trying her best to explain things in a clear manner without too much medical jargon or condescension. "We can try a head snare, which means I will place a device behind the ears and into the mouth and try to bring it around along with her contractions. If I am unsuccessful, then we are looking at a cesarian which could be costly and dangerous. The foal may not survive in this position very long, but if it does not survive then that would open up a few more options to save the mare."

Abbot placed the cap back on his head while nodding. His eyes fell on her with an air of confidence. "Whatever you think is best, Doc. You know I trust you."

A tiny frown touched the young veterinarian's lips as she heard his words. The thought of failing Abbot Normandy when he considered her his personal champion-well, it made her that much more determined to succeed.

She rose for a moment, reaching for the device she referred to as a head snare, a long pole-like gadget with a noose at its end. As she maneuvered it into the mare's uterus, careful to lubricate it fully before insertion, she relied on feel as much as instinct as she tried desperately to capture exactly the right position. It was so very rare that she got it on the first try, but a few years worth of experience and a natural talent helped her hook it over the tiny ears and through the small delicate mouth.

A tiny bell of joy rang through her as she felt the device secure the little foal and the strong surprising motion of the little one in response. It was a sure sign the foal was still alive and fighting. Her spirits high, she waited for the next contraction to come through.

She didn't have to wait long, the mare's sides heaved with the next spasm and Carmilla was able to direct the foal's head and neck, providing guidance without traction. Too much force and she could fracture the mandible, or where the incisors or teeth of the foal would eventually be.

Together, she and the mare worked to free the foal from it's tight spot and with a sudden easy sliding motion, the foal's neck bent round and it's head came into proper position on top of the forelegs. With a tiny yelp of delight, Carmilla moved her hands to the shoulders of the little beast, helping guide the foal out with each push from its mother.

With a great rush, the foal came sliding out into the straw in a tangled heap of too long legs. Dr. Karnstein rose to a kneeling position, her smile spreading across her face as she admired the slippery little body. "A fine colt," she declared looking up at Abbot.

He returned her smile with a confident beam. "That he is! And look!"

He gestured to the mare, who had lifted her head to smell her newborn. A soft grumble started deep in her chest as she stared over at the seal brown form, recognition reflecting in her eyes that this little one was hers and hers alone.

Dr. Karnstein watched the little scene play out with a warming in her heart, as this was her favorite part of these long tiring nights. The little miracle's first few moments of life, and the happiness in the mare's expression as her long tiring delivery ended and her journey of being a mother began.

She stayed only for a few minutes more, before standing up and expressing her goodbyes to Abbot, who insisted she wash up inside his house and have a cup of tea before leaving the old weather-beaten farm. She waved him away, telling him she had a metal pail inside her truck and some good soap meant just for this type of occasion. She informed him while she appreciated his kindness, she really ought to be getting back home to her bed, and try to gather any precious few hours sleep that she could before she was called out again on another emergency.

They said their goodbyes before she headed out to her truck, shivering in the cold morning air. Her watch said it was 2:03 am, and her eyelids felt like they had lead-weights attached to them. What a night! First a horse sick with colic, a painful sickness of the stomach that was lethal to some equines, and now a difficult delivery. She hoped this would be her last call, as she really did want to take a nice hot shower before curling up in her nice cozy bed. She had put fresh sheets on it just yesterday, and it would still have that coarse feeling and sweet clean smell.

As she climbed into the Ford F-350, all of her tools safe inside the numerous utility storage bins serving as her truck bed, she started it with a yawn. The rumbling engine burst to life immediately, and her computer's screen glowed with a soft hum as it reminded her of the paperwork still left to do.

Her least favorite part of these calls, typing up a novel's worth of notes and charges. Thankfully Abbot would be happy to receive his bill via the mailing service, his check coming back immediately with the old man's shaky cursive writing. She always wrote him a discounted amount, something Lola Perry, her office assistant and only other employee of Dr. Carmilla Karnstein DVM, frowned upon greatly. "You can't keep cutting people deals, Carm," she would say with a roll of her eyes, "we can't keep the lights on if you're only making enough to cover the materials used."

Carmilla shook the thought of Perry away as she buckled her seat belt. She made okay money, being a country vet certainly had it's perks. She specialized in horses although she saw the occasional farm animal. People were past considering horses as livestock and instead saw them as pets or companions. This made them more inclined to spend money on the horse's general comfort, and being an equine vet often had its monetary gains.

She understood the expense of maintaining such a large animal and tried to keep her prices fair and her diagnosis to the point. She wanted people to think she was spending their money like it was her own, and this had made her the most popular vet in her district, something that was both a blessing and curse. It kept her very busy, but since she refused any extra help, she was run ragged weekly.

It also kept her romantic life and friend circle rather… empty, something that Perry was always quick to point out. Perry was pretty much the only friend she had, besides her clients and she wasn't so sure those counted as friends.

She drove the miles back to her practice and home, a large farmhouse set in the country hills of Central Virginia. The cheery yellow clapboard reared up in front of her truck's headlights. Stifling a yawn, she cut the engine and climbed out before gesturing to the sleeping dog sitting in the seat beside her. "Come on, Jack," she said to the red and white husky, "let's get some sleep while we can."

He yawned and then stretched slowly, staring at her through piercing blue eyes. He hopped down from the truck's bench seat with an agile bound, landing and racing off toward the porch with an easy gait. As his nails clipped up the first two stairs, he stopped and turned and lifted his leg, peeing all over Perry's plants lining the stairs with a glint in his pale eyes.

"Jack!" Carmilla reprimanded as she followed behind him, "bad dog!"

He finished his business with a snap to attention, before climbing the last three steps and doing a little dance at the door. "You can bet," she called after him, "Perry's going to know it was you when those flowers die."

He regarded her with his red brows, a permanent quizzical expression on his face from the fire colored mask ringing his eyes before wagging his tail slowly.

She climbed the steps with a tired drag before opening the unlocked door and following Jack through the dark empty foyer.

A light glinted from the kitchen and Carmilla frowned, following its glow as she passed through the hardwood covered hallways and coming to stop at the swinging white door. Pushing it open, she found Perry standing with her back to her, brooding over a steaming cup of tea. Hearing Carmilla approach, Perry turned round with a start before relaxing as she realized it was just her old childhood friend.

"Hey Carm," she said quietly, "how was the call?" Her blue eyes were distant, betraying her emotions.

"Fine. Foal made it. What's wrong with you? Why are you up?"

Carmilla wasn't known for her subtlety. Some people found it endearing, others… well, not so much.

"Good about the foal. Nothing. Well, I mean, you know."

Carmilla quirked an eyebrow, "Uh, no, I'm afraid I don't."

"Don't tell me you've forgotten what tomorrow is." Perry's voice was a little surprised and maybe a bit miffed.

Carmilla paused. Tomorrow was October 20th, and that was exactly eleven days before Halloween, her favorite holiday. And then it hit her like a sucker punch to the jaw.

Tomorrow was the anniversary of her wife's death.

Right.

_That._

She regarded Perry with a guarded expression. "I spend a lot of time trying not to think about what happened on that day. Also, a lot of money. In Therapy. Which you made me go to for two solid years."  _And I also spend a lot of time trying now to think about how I couldn't save her._

Perry nodded. "I know. I don't like reminding you. You asked, and she was my friend… I know she was your - your  _partner_  but she was important to me too and it's hard to mourn someone when one of the only other connections to her acts as if she doesn't even exist."

Perry's tone wasn't judgemental or accusatory but still Carmilla bristled.

"I don't  _like_ talking about it but it doesn't mean we  _can't_ talk about it."

"Right." Perry said a little soothingly. "I know. I just… It's just hard. I found some of her old things in a box in the shed. A few ribbons from horse shows, a photograph of the two of us at the annual Mayson Fair…" she trailed off, her voice broken by the roughness of choked back tears.

Carmilla's answering reply came out like chunks of gravel. "Yeah. It's hard to remember the happy times without feeling sad. It's why I-I try not to think about it all."

Perry nodded, her red curls bouncing with the movement, and acquiesced. "I get it. I do. I don't mean to make you feel bad or guilty. I just miss her. That's all. I wish there was something we could have done… Made her go to the doctor more or something."

Carmilla nodded unhappily. Perry didn't need to point anything out. Carmilla knew there was a lot more she could have done. For example, she could have asked her wife how she was feeling, instead of focusing every ounce of her energy on vet school and her own career. All the while, the love of her life was wasting away, eaten up by breast cancer. It had metastasized everywhere before they even found it… But it didn't stop the guilt or the what if's for Carmilla, not even by a long shot.

"Ell loved you, you know that." That was all Carmilla could say. All she could give.

Perry looked up, tears brimming but not falling. "Yeah," she agreed, "but she didn't love anyone like she loved you."

Carmilla turned away, unable to take anymore of this conversation, calling Jack with a snap of her fingers. He followed at her heels obediently before making a half-hearted snap at one of Perry's indoor plants as they passed through the swinging kitchen door together.

"I know one thing," Perry called after them, "she would NOT have loved that demon dog!"

Carmilla couldn't help herself. She laughed. It was true Jack made himself the bane of Perry's existence. Eating the tops of her flowers, peeing on them, and placing freshly killed moles and voles on her pillow were just a few of his favorite past-times.

But it didn't mean Ell would have disliked him. She would have loved him. He was unique and fiercely independent, if not a bit mischievous and full of sass. The best kind of dog, Ell would say with a grin, as she described the perfect dog they would have some day.

Carmilla's laugh died on her lips as she realized…

The perfect dog that Ell never even got to meet. He was born five days shy of the first anniversary of her death. A gift given to Carm by Ell's father after she spent that awful first death-a-versary (what she and Perry came to call it) with him and Perry at Ell's favorite place in Ashville, North Carolina.

She swallowed. It would be a long night. A sleepless one. She should have accepted Abbot's offer of washing up and tea. At least while she was working, she wasn't thinking about the true horror that was her life.

A life spent without Ell. A life spent without her best friend, partner and lover.

* * *

She was rudely awakened by the forceful blow of a pillow again her face.

"Get up, Hollis! It's the last day of term and we're free for a whole month." A short-haired impish freckled face hazily came into view as Laura Hollis blinked away the blurry shroud of drowsiness.

"Did you really just smack me awake with my own pillow?" she muttered grumpily as she clutched at her bright yellow blanket.

Her roommate cocked a devilish grin. "Of course. How else to wake the dead?"

"You're an ass, LaF." Laura responded, raising up a hand in a rude gesture.

Susan LaFontaine or LaF as their friends called them had been Laura's roommate since freshman year. They were fast friends as Laura remained respectful of LaF's gender pronouns and general obsession with all things biology, and LaF remained respectful of Laura's obsession with social justice crusade after social justice crusade.

"Come on you lazy lesbian," LaF cajoled, "we have so much to do today."

"Go away." Laura replied. "All I wanted to do is sleep and forget about the fact that in exactly one semester I'm done with college."

"Why?"

"Because then I have to look for a real job, get married, and have kids. Be an adult. Clean my room. Get up before 9am. You know,  _exist_ or whatever."

LaF frowned. "Whoa, buzzkill. Ever since you and Danny called it quits, you're like the come-to-life version of Eeyore."

"Thanks." Laura replied wryly. Although she had to admit LaF was right, she was more melancholy than usual, but you break up with your girlfriend of three years and try to be bright ray of sunshine.

"So get up! Face the day! Come on, we were gonna go look at houses for rent and then visit Kirsch at his new digs in downtown Richmond."

"Ugh," Laura replied. "Okay. Give me like a year and I'll be ready."

"Hollis! You gotta cut this shit out. It's only making you look like Danny was the only thing you had to be happy about!"

LaF had a point there. Danny  _had_  been the only thing she had to be happy about, as her degree in journalism wasn't exactly going as planned. She managed a lousy GPA and refused to think about life beyond graduation and being the girlfriend of the Summer Society President. It was only when Danny unexpectedly and without explanation dumped her that she found herself staring at a life full of uncertainty.

"Fine!" Laura snapped as she sat up and the blanket fell away to reveal a soft white camisole that clung to her skin in exactly all the right ways.

LaF averted their eyes immediately and Laura heaved a sigh. It wasn't a secret LaFontaine had been crushing on her a little-well, a lot-since ever, but they both studiously ignored it. Best friends was all Laura ever saw for her and LaF, and this of course made things super awkward should they ever broach the topic of their romantic feelings for Laura.

Laura broke the awkwardness by saying sternly, "but if Danny is there, I'm leaving!"

"Why would Danny be there?" LaFontaine asked with a quizzical look.

"Oh come on, don't play dumb. We both know Danny and Kirsch are sleeping together. It's not some big secret. It's been six months. I get it. She's moved on, and I don't hate her for sleeping with him. I just  _don't_  particularly want to see evidence up close and personal."

It was LaFontaine's turn to sigh. "It happened once after you two broke up and Kirsch practically got down on his knees to be forgiven about it. They were both drunk and you and Danny had horrific hate sex over it afterward so he's not even the last one to have slept with her. Believe me, these walls are  _thin_. You guys may be 'broken up' but you sure do sleep with each other a lot to be EXs."

Laura's eyes widened. She didn't know that LaF knew about her escapades with Danny. They'd been so careful. Sneaking each other in, refusing to admit it to anybody, and relentlessly hating each other in public. It made things exciting… and rather  _dysfunctional_  but who wants to focus on such negativity?

"Well I- I just -" she sputtered, "We are just friends!"

"Yeah," LaF said, "and you and I are gonna get married next month and have children and name them Darwin and Hillary."

Laura frowned at her before getting up, her bare legs tanned from time spent out in the sunshine, and her short little yellow gym shorts revealing muscular thighs. She ran daily for those legs. She loved running, it cleared her head and left her body toned and fit.

She tossed her caramel colored hair up into a low ponytail before bouncing toward the door, leaving LaF standing in her wake.

"Come on, LaF, let's go to Kirsch's before more ridiculous things come out of your mouth."

* * *

They arrived just in time for Kirsch's house warming party to really start warming up. It was a small cramped apartment on West Grace St, and an eclectic group of people made up the party. There were typical Richmonders with their hipster clothes and haircuts, and then others like Laura who subscribed to their own style.

Laura was sort of a warm summer breeze when it came to outfits, sticking to bright colors that stood out against her naturally tan skin and fell loosely against her lithe frame.

LaF on the other hand dressed like a typical Richmonder, their clothes were dark and tight, and fashionable men's bags always thrown over their shoulder while cute little ballet flats hugged their tiny feet.

They mingled among Kirsch's group of friends before standing in a small group that included him. He greeted them both with a warm smile, his blue eyes bright with childlike happiness and infectious innocence. "Hottie Laura and LaFantastabro! How goes it?" This greeting was usually followed by  _Where's D-Money?_ in the past but that particular person was an off topic subject between Kirsch and Laura these days.

"Doing great Kirsch," LaF returned, "LOVE the new place."

"Thanks!" He returned, gesturing to the fresh paint and modern furniture. "One of the bros from the Zetas totally did the decorating. He's like, definitely, one of the best interior designers ever to go to VCU."

"It would be better if it wasn't crawling with the Zetas," a sultry voice behind them mocked, and Laura turned around to see Danny Lawrence standing there. Her thick voluptuous red hair fell down nearly to the small of her back, and she was so tall her presence practically filled the room. Laura's heart skipped a beat as it always did whenever she saw Danny, but lately it was more from anxiety than happiness.

"D-Money," Kirsch greeted carefully, his smile fading a little, "I don't remember putting you on the e-vite. You know Hottie Laura doesn't, like, want to see you and I feel it is my honor as a Zeta to honor the wishes of a hottie."

Danny eyed him with a glower. "I'm not here for you idiot, I came as an official representative of the Summer Society."

Laura looked desperately at LaF who regarded her with a weak shrug. Neither of them understood the petty politics of the local Greek Clubs beyond the fact that they hated each other.

Kirsch rubbed a hand behind his head with a grimace. "Already?" he asked unhappily.

Danny nodded. "You know that eventually we would have to discuss this. What better time than a public party so no one can say it wasn't… civil."

Kirsch gestured toward his closed bedroom door. "Okay then, let's get this over with." Danny stepped in front of him with a haughty frown before turning her eyes on Laura. Her gaze softened for a moment and she made a gesture with two of her fingers, a soft and inaudible hello.

Laura returned the signal grudgingly. Danny was a part of her and it was hard to forget that, even though she knew she should.

"Can we talk… later?" Danny mouthed.

Laura considered, knowing exactly what Danny meant by 'talk', before nodding.

LaF kicked her in the shin but Laura ignored it. Let LaF try resisting the only woman they had ever been with when the sex was better than ever-see how successful that went for them!

Danny and Kirsch disappeared behind his bedroom door, and Laura couldn't help but wonder what exactly they were having to meet about… Probably some stupid turf war discussion. Idiocy! She never understood Danny's obsession with the Summer Society, but then again, there were a lot of things about Danny she couldn't quite get.

* * *

The party was dying down by the time Danny and Kirsch emerged from behind the door. Danny looked annoyed, Kirsch looked confused (but this was a normal expression for him), and Laura found herself seated on his plush leather couch without anyone to talk to.

Danny's blue eyes scanned the room before landing on Laura, and she began to walk over before her steps were halted as a dark haired girl plopped down in the empty seat next to her ex-girlfriend.

Soft dark curls spilled out over the strange girl's shoulders, while dark eyes regarded the room with a stony expression, before she pulled out her iPhone and began to stare at it like she was willing it to ring with all her might.

Laura caught by surprise by the sudden appearance of someone else on the couch, greeted her in the typical Laura way. "Hello!" she said too brightly.

The dark-eyed girl looked up from her phone with a start. "Hello," she mumbled back, returning the greeting about as prickly as a porcupine's quill.

"I'm Laura."

"Oh. Nice to meet you." She returned her eyes to her phone, sliding the unlock tab and hoping to send not so subtle signals to be left alone.

"And you are?" It would take more than that to shut Laura up.

"Carmilla. Dr. Carmilla Karnstein." The response was short, curt, and formal.

"Doctor?" Laura asked curiously.

"I'm a vet." Carmilla remained stubbornly abrupt.

"Oh how cool!" Laura returned. "What kind of animals do you work on?"

"Horses."

"Oh I don't like horses," Laura wrinkled her nose, "they're big and dangerous at both ends and crafty in the middle."

That statement got Carmilla's attention and she looked away from her phone, a ghost of a smile on her lips. "Crafty in the middle?"

"Yes. I went on a trail ride once in the girl scouts. My horse wanted to eat the grass on the side of the little path thing, and when he wasn't doing that and yanking my arms out of their sockets, he was running up the butt of the horse in front of me… And that horse didn't like him, kept trying to kick him with his back feet the whole time. It was not only terrifying but made me appreciate solid ground more than I ever have before."

Carmilla laughed. "Every non-horse person has a story like that. My wife used to say-"

She cut herself off suddenly. Frowned, and stood up before offering a brief goodbye. "Sorry, have to go. It was nice to meet you, Lauren."

"Laura," Laura found herself automatically correcting her but it didn't matter. Carmilla was already retreating within the throng of people. Laura watched her walk up to a girl talking to LaF and rudely interrupt them, gesturing toward the door while dragging the other girl behind her like a hostage.

"Something I said?" Laura heard herself whisper, before Danny slid into the empty seat beside her with an obviously unhappy expression.

"Who was that?" the amazon-sized woman demanded perhaps a bit too quickly.

"Huh?" Laura asked with mild surprise. Usually Danny never cared about, well, anything Laura did.

"That girl. Who was she?" Danny explained slowly as if Laura were being incredibly thick.

"Oh. Dr. Carmilla Karnstein." Laura explained as if it were obvious.

"What did you two talk about?"

"Horses."

"Horses? You  _hate_  horses."

"Exactly."

Danny regarded her with a thoroughly confused expression before saying. "Um, okay, you ready to go… talk?"

Laura studied the door that Dr. Carmilla Karnstein had so abruptly stormed out before finding LaF's eyes.

"Actually, no. I've got to go… do something."

Danny looked at her with incredulous expression. "You've got to do what?"

"Be anywhere but here." Laura returned absentmindedly before standing up and simply walking away, leaving Danny open mouthed in her wake.


	2. Two

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> No copyright infringement intended. I do not have a beta so this story is raw. I apologize for any and all grammatical mistakes and errors. Enjoy. Dedicated to H, the reason I could write a love story at all.

* * *

 

Perry studied Carmilla over her hot cup of tea.

"That girl you were sitting with at that party Wednesday night… She was a cutie!" she said with a bit of a smile. "In a Lois Lane kind of a way I guess."

Carmilla waved a hand, settling herself down at the breakfast bar with a bowl of cereal. "Was she?" she said nonchalantly.

"Oh whatever, don't play it cool. I haven't seen you actually speak to a girl in… in ages. You must have liked her a little bit." Perry passed Carmilla the sugar bowl instinctively and watched with a mildly disgusted expression as Carmilla began dumping spoonfuls into her cereal.

"We just discussed horses." Carmilla said simply through a mouthful of cookie crisps as if this explained everything.

"Did you get her number?" Perry probed, leaning across the bar and studying Carmilla hopefully.

"What? No! I told you. I'm not dating." Carmilla shifted uncomfortably and took a swig of her orange juice. "Besides, she doesn't like horses so it wouldn't work out."

Perry cocked her head. "Maybe that would be a good thing, you know? Get away from them for awhile. Go on real dates. You know, to the movies or to dinner, and then go have some casual sex. It would be good for you."

Carmilla's nostrils flared as she gazed up at Perry with an irate expression. "I don't remember asking you for life or dating advice, thank you very much."

"I know, I know. But it's been ages since you got any. Does it even still all work down there? The plumbing, I mean." Perry's blue eyes danced mischievously.

Carmilla's expression darkened and her only reaction was to stand up and dump the rest of her sugary breakfast in the sink. She turned on her heel and whistled for Jack to follow her out the door.

Does it still work down there, humph! Mumbling to herself about no privacy and zero boundaries, she began to gather her materials for her morning appointments.

Perry still stood in the kitchen, grinning at her phone as she read a text message, before she settled down in Carmilla's empty stool with a girlish sigh. Boy did this LaFontaine really know how to sweet-talk a gal….

* * *

LaFontaine and Laura kept having the same argument over and over.

Now they were having it again during TV night in their living room.

"So let me get this straight," LaFontaine began, "you want me to text the girl I just met that you're interested in her friend--"

"Not interested in her friend," Laura interrupted quickly. "She's married."

"Exactly! So why am I talking to my definitely not married potential something about your very married potential nothing?" LaFontaine threw up their hands to accentuate their frustration.

Laura smiled patiently. "Because I'm not interested in dating her, I just want to continue our conversation from before."

"You and your issues with things unfinished, I swear." LaFontaine struggled upward from their position on the raggedy old armchair, before heading toward the brick wall containing their extensive collection of books.

The bookcases were cut lovingly into the brick; the books seemed a part of the landscape itself, as natural as the coase and porous blocks surrounding them.

"You can't just let things go. Like that one time we went to see How to Train Your Dragon in 3D, and the projector broke right before the end, so you made us go and rewatch the whole damn thing again an hour later, just so you could see the last fifteen minutes. Or the time you started that lemon juicing diet to 'cleanse' your body of negativity, and almost lost all of your hair because you couldn't possibly concede that it was definitely not doing anything other than cleansing you of hair!"

"May I point out," Laura broke in, "the hair that regrew in was VERY shiny."

"Uh huh," LaF rolled their electric blue eyes, "my point is that you cannot let things go. It's like a weird little obsession for you. Until you hear the end of whatever whacked out story she was going to tell you, you will absolutely terrorize this poor woman for the rest of her life."

"Befriend her, not terrorize her... jeez you act like I'm going to force her to be friends with me against her will or something."

"That's exactly what you're planning to do, Laura. Let's be honest here."

"No it isn't! Well... not exactly."

"Oh sure it's not. Hmmm, let's see… how about that time you insisted on sitting with that weird kid during Biology 101? You know the one you said looked like he could really use a friend even though he clearly fit the profile for a serial killer, which I reminded you about constantly but you completely ignored. So eventually you wore me down and we sat with him. He never said one word, but you just went and chatted his ear off as per usual," LaFontaine paused dramatically. "You just kept calling him different and wise. Doesn't waste his words, lives a life of silence for a higher reason…"

LaFontaine's voice dropped an octave. "Little did you expect, by the time midterms rolled around, he had taken pictures of your bare feet under the table and photoshopped himself doing disgusting things to them! The only reason we even found out was because he made it the background on his laptop! Which, may I remind you, the entire class saw when he hooked it up to the projector to present his final powerpoint project!"

Laura's eyes widened a little at the memory. She shrugged her shoulders. "Okay, maybe befriending Larry was a little out there, even for me but--"

"Out there? Out there?! The kid wore denim overalls to class! Denim overalls! The only thing missing was a straw hat, cowboy boots and a chainsaw to cut you up into little bits with!"

"Now you're not being fair or very nice, LaFointaine--"

"Not being fair? Not being fair?! Do you not recall that in the picture he photoshopped himself holding your foot like it was a very tasty hotdog! It literally looked like he was about to devour your delicate little toes whole. Because if you've forgotten, I'm pretty sure he's got a whole website online if you'd like me to get on ole trusty Google."

Laura snorted. "Okay fine, not my best moment, but I don't regret trying to be nice to him. Just because he turned out to be a… unique individual doesn't mean that--"

"I can't take you seriously anymore! Unique individual? UNIQUE individual?! Unique individuals enjoy polka music or bee-keeping, they don't make fake photos of themselves eating their fellow lab partner's hotdog foot!"

LaF selected a book from the shelf and strode back over to their favorite armchair, throwing themselves into it with an angry huff.

"You've made your point." Laura snapped. "Could you please just ask her what the name of her friend was? That's it. You don't even have to say anything more than that."

"Fine," LaF muttered. "But if you go missing I'm telling the cops you practically painted a target on your back that states: I attract crazy people!"

"And now what does that say about you, roomie?" Laura smiled sweetly. "After all, you do live with me."

LaF didn't miss a beat. "Oh it simply means that I'm the Captain of the Crazy Squad."

Laura just rolled her eyes and threw a pillow at them before hitting the resume button on the TV. The background music for Dr. Who began to play at an ear splitting volume.

LaF ignored it entirely, choosing to settle deeper into their chair and turn the book's page with a determined expression. By this time, LaF was used to all of Laura's idosynchries including her elderly-like enjoyment of incredibly loud television.

* * *

Carmilla stood ankle deep in muck as she surveyed the scene before. A sick horse, a frightened young girl and a feeling of gloom hanging in the air. Just the right way to start off her Friday morning.

The horse, a deep red color, was laying down, his flanks and chest covered with sweat.

"He's been like this since I got up this morning. Just laying here in the mud." His worried owner, a sixteen year old girl named Cindy Foster, knelt beside him and stroked his cheek. "I've tried to get him to stand up, but he just won't do it."

Carmilla nodded. Symptoms of various diseases raced through her head. Colic. Laminitis. Mud fever.

This poor horse could be stricken with any of those. The only way to know was to start working him up and to truly treat him, he would need to be on his feet.

She turned to the young girl with a confident smile. "His name is Flame, right?"

Cindy nodded quickly. "Yes, because of his color."

"A perfect name for him indeed." Carmilla agreed. "Let's try to get Flame standing upright so I can get vitals and a better idea of what we might be dealing with."

Cindy handed her the horse's halter and leadrope wordlessly. Clearly the young girl felt Dr. Karnstein was Flame's only hope of standing. The halter, a contraption made of nylon, hooked around the horse's head (over the nose, behind the ears, and under the jaw) and was used like a collar for a dog--to control the animal's movements. A leadrope, much like a leash, clipped to a moveable brass ring just under the horse's muzzle and was used to walk the horse, or to tie them to something immobile.

Carmilla slipped the halter on Flame before stepping back and tugging on the leadrope with all her might. At first, Flame resisted all of her tugging, groaning softly before turning his head to bite at his sides.

Colic.

Carmilla's spirits dampened just a little bit.

She tugged again and Flame just stared at her with a blank expression. He was clearly checked out from everything happening around him. It was not a very good sign. Carmilla bit her lip, but refused to give up just yet.

"Okay, Cindy," she said, "let's go get some help and see if we can roll him to his feet.

Cindy nodded and together they gathered four people to help them try to get Flame to stand. With someone at his rump, to give him an encouraging slap, and two people at his far right side, and Carmilla at his head, they were ready to try.

"Okay everyone, we've gone over what to do, on my count… 1… 2… 3!" With a mighty heave, the good samaritans did their best to try and encourage Flame to his feet. At the sound of the pat on his rump, the horse lurched and then flailed his four legs in an attempt to stand. After one or two two tries, he seemed to find some grip in the deep mud and was up and standing on four hooves.

Carmilla already her stethoscope out, listening to his midsection (what horse people referred to as a barrel due to it's shape) and checking for any gut sounds. If there was sufficient noise, then it might just be a gas colic and not something more serious like a torsion or a twist in his intestines.

The bubbling she heard made her smile immediately. Gut sounds were always a good sign. "Okay Cindy," she said, "let's get Flame walking somewhere with less mud. I'm going to give him a dose of banamine which will help reduce his pain and get things moving again."

Cindy nodded eagerly, taking the leadrope from Carmilla and leading Flame to the arena where people rode their horses. It was composed of crushed gravel dust and was much dryer than the dirt (now mud) paddock.

Carmilla walked to her truck, thinking about the things she would say to Cindy. Cindy was a kind and loving owner, but Flame was her first horse and she was making some classic mistakes in his care. These mistakes, while maybe not deadly on their own, had all piled up to cause the colic. With some education, she knew Cindy would put right the things that were wrong, and Flame would be no worse for the wear.

It was a hard job being a vet at times, because some owners just didn't care and they would continue to cause their horse pain like this, but thankfully it was the owners like Cindy who kept Dr. Karnstein going. She knew that the young girl would correct every mistake.

And that made the struggles worth it, or at least in Carmilla's opinion anyway.

* * *

It took three days but LaFontaine finally managed to acquire the name of Laura's mysterious veterinarian.

They were standing in the kitchen, having breakfast, when LaFontaine slipped over a small post-it note with the long awaited name on it.

Laura unfolded it quickly and beamed.

Dr. Carmilla Karnstein.

"And I honestly didn't even have to ask her outright," LaF said, a bit begrudgingly, "I just asked where she worked."

Laura stared at the written title with some excitement. It was true that she had issues with things unfinished... and also with people who didn't want to be her friend… and maybe a few boundaries here or there... but LaF wasn't discussing her many flaws for once, so she certainly wasn't going to put them on the warpath.

"Thanks, LaF," Laura said as she hurried over to her laptop. "Have you been out on a date with this new crush yet?"

"Well no, I'm taking my time but-- Oh. Oh my god," LaFontaine groaned when they saw Laura settling herself in front of her computer.

"What?" Laura looked up with mild confusion.

"You're googling her!"

"Of course I am," Laura said matter of factly, "what if she's another hotdog foot eater like you said? I don't need two websites devoted to my feet. I'm not that vain, you know."

LaFontaine just grunted in response and went into the living room.

The cursor blinked and Laura typed in:

_Dr. Carmilla Karnstein_

The first result was the practice website and Laura clicked on the hyperlink. She was taken to a brisk and very clean site with everything neatly categorized and explained to the infinite detail. She scrolled down to the bottom and saw: Website Managed by Lola Perry, Executive Office Assistant.

What a fancy title! Maybe this new girl was the perfect one for LaFontaine. After all, LaF was the most laid back person Laura knew, but for some reason they were also always incredibly attracted to uptight crazy type-As… Which might explain their crush on Laura a little bit.

Just a bit.

Laura shook off her thoughts and clicked on the 'About Our Vet' tab. A photo of Carmilla seated on a beautiful brown horse with a black mane and tail came into view. It was captioned: Dr. Karnstein and her beloved horse, Linus.

Scrolling down to the text box underneath it, Laura read…

_Dr. Carmilla Karnstein, graduate of the elite Cornell large animal practice program, is a successful and talented veterinarian servicing the Central Virginia area. Originally from Hampton, VA she attended VCU's School of Biology before graduating from the honors program with a 3.9 GPA. She then went on to Cornell, where she was top of her class and had her pick of internships. After interning at New Bolton for three years, she returned close to home to open up her own practice. She is working on her certification for equine chiropractic work and spends her free time volunteering at Hope for the Horses Rescue and Rehabilitation center._

Her biography left out any mention of a wife, but Laura supposed that wasn't so strange. It was a professional website and maybe she kept personal things off of it.

Going back to the main google search engine, she typed in:

_Hope for the Horses Rescue and Rehabilitation_

A website immediately popped up showing a beautiful white horse frolicking in a large field. The website stated they saved horses from all kinds of terrible situations like abuse, neglect or starvation, or auctions where horses were potentially sold to slaughter for their meat.

Carmilla's smiling face was plastered all over it. This rescue sure was proud of their Dr. Karnstein.

She was shown in photos beaming next to horses and the crazy kinds of people attracted to the big messy beasts. There was also quite a bit of bragging surrounding the young vet's donation of her time and pro-bono treatment of the horses. The website spoke of her as 'Wonder Vet' and 'Super Woman' and mentioned that she still volunteered every Monday despite having a network of over one thousand personal clients.

"Every Monday huh," Laura heard herself whisper.

She then clicked on a tab entitled:

_How to Volunteer_

* * *

It had taken Laura nearly forty five minutes to find the horse rescue. Mostly because it was tucked back in the middle of nowhere.

When she had parked her car in the small gravel lot and opened the door of her Honda Civic, she found herself immediately accosted by the smell.

It wasn't a bad smell per say, just a very strong one. It smelled of dirt and earth and of course what could only be manure.

She took a few steps and grimaced, looking down at her feet. Her boots, freshly purchased off of Amazon, went up and over her ankles and they were made of strong stiff leather. The internet referred to them as 'Paddock Boots' and apparently they were necessary to be worn around horses. According to the numerous google searches Laura had done a few days previous, they protected your foot better than normal shoes should you get stepped on by a horse, something that made Laura swallow a little harder when she had read about that.

They needed to be broken in according to the reviewers, and Laura could finally see exactly what they meant by that, as the boots were like two stiff wooden blocks strapped to her feet.

She wore skinny jeans and a soft yellow baby-doll top with a white lacy cardigan. In her hands she carried a pair of gardening gloves and a water bottle. The horse rescue's website said she needed to be able to lift fifty pounds and also be capable of manual labor, so she figured a pair of gloves couldn't hurt. The water added in because her mother had taught her all about good hydration while working hard.

"Are you Laura?"

A voice captured her attention and she turned round with a smile. "Hi. Yes! That's me. I mean, yes I'm Laura. Nice to meet you!"

"Hello Laura, my name is Denise. I'm the owner of the rescue. We spoke briefly on the phone." Denise was a very tall and very blonde woman who looked to be maybe somewhere in her mid-forties. She was as round as she was tall, but very athletic looking and Laura finally understood those old romance novels descriptions of a handsome woman. Denise was indeed a very handsome woman.

She held out a hand and Laura returned the handshake warmly.

"Great! I read on the website you accept all volunteers, even if they don't know anything about horses." Laura said, wanting to get her lack of experience with horses out on the table.

"Yes of course. We'll teach you proper handling and safety techniques around them. It's a great way to learn and of course help out horses who are in desperate need of love and attention." Denise motioned for Laura to follow her into the big red barn. "So I'm guessing you don't know a whole lot about horses then?"

"Uh… no, not a thing." Laura admitted with a weak smile.

"That's perfectly fine. You'll walk out of her knowing more than you ever wanted to, and that's just your first day." Denise laughed, but Laura fidgeted with her gloves a bit nervously. She wasn't so sure she liked the sound of that!

Denise continued on, giving Laura a mini-tour of the farm. "This is the main barn, it's laid out in a horse-shoe shape. The stalls run along the main indoor ring, that's where we ride the horses when there is bad weather or if they are not very well trained and need less distractions, and then we have eight paddocks bordering the property alongside a larger outdoor arena. If you follow me, I'll show you the tack room, where we keep items like bridles, saddles, and brushes to groom the horse with." Denise started off at a brisk pace and Laura had to powerwalk to keep up with her.

Groom the horses? Laura was confused. Did she mean like brush their hair and put little bows in it? The only kind of grooming she knew about was for dogs, and that was because she dated a girl who bathed dogs at PetSmart. Her EX was always complaining about having to paint doggy nails all day--did that mean horses got pedicures too?

Laura didn't have time to ask any questions, because Denise was already hurrying along.

"Over here is the grain room, it's where we keep what we use to feed the horses twice daily. Here is the bathroom, I'm sure you know what that's for," Denise paused and Laura laughed politely while nodding. "And here is where we put the horses for grooming, tacking or bathing."

There's that word again: grooming. Laura looked for little pink bows and a giant bottle of pony nail polish, but all she saw were thick wooden-back bristle brushes and strong paddle brushes.

Denise was motioning to three concrete bays, bordered by wooden fencing, each one having two long straps for someone to hook the horses up to so that they could groom, wash or get them ready to ride.

"Today we will just have you learn how to muck out the stalls for the first hour and then for the second hour I'll have another volunteer show you how to groom one of the horses. How does that sound?" Denise acted as if grooming a horse was some type of reward and Laura swallowed nervously.

"You mean- I might have to, you know, touch one? And by grooming--do you mean like painting their toes and giving them little haircuts?"

Denise just laughed. "Oh you're a funny one! I like you already! Come on and follow me."

Laura didn't know how to tell her she wasn't joking.

She led Laura over to a little shed and opened up the doors to reveal a plethora of tools and equipment. She selected a large wheelbarrow and placed two pitchforks and shovels inside of it. Denise picked up the handles of the wheelbarrow and said, "Follow me."

Obediently Laura trailed behind her and they entered the barn and stopped at a massive wooden door. Denise showed Laura how to slide it back and forth, revealing an empty twelve by twelve room with a twenty foot high ceiling. It was bedded thick with something that looked like sawdust and had a hay manger, feed bin, and two plastic brightly colored water buckets. "This is a called a stall," Denise said. "It's where the horses live when they are inside. Each horse gets one of their own."

"Like little horsey apartments." Laura said with a smile.

Denise laughed. "Exactly!"

Denise walked inside of the stall with a pitchfork and motioned for Laura to follow. Laura stayed right on Denise's heels and watched with a curious expression as the woman separated piles of manure and dark wet urine spots from the clean pine bedding. She tossed the soiled shavings into the wheelbarrow and then raked the clean ones over the bare spots. Mirroring her work, Laura picked up her own pitchfork and followed suit.

Together they cleaned fourteen stalls over the next hour, and Denise commented frequently on how quickly Laura picked up on the art of mucking a stall. Once they reached their last stall, Denise turned and smiled at Laura and said, "Okay! Now for the fun part! You'll get to brush your first horse."

Laura's eyes widened. "Are you sure there aren't any more stalls to clean?"

Denise laughed again. "What a jokester you are! We are going to have to keep you around!"

Laura wasn't sure how to respond to that and followed a bit forlornly behind Denise as the older woman led her to a stall that actually had a horse inside of it. Sliding back the big wooden door to reveal a very large brown horse.

"This is Diablo," Denise introduced proudly.

"Um, as in… the devil?" Laura asked with a worried note in her voice.

"Yes! But it's just an ironic name. He's as gentle as they come. Come in here and meet him!"

Laura was weighing her options on entering a wooden box with a horse named after the devil when a voice called out, "Hey Denise! Did you want me doing strangles titers on the new horses in the far paddock or the-- _oh_."

Laura turned around and found herself ten feet away from none other than Dr. Carmilla Karnstein.

And even Laura had to admit, Carmilla didn't exactly seem happy to see her.

* * *

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have at least six more chapters planned. I enjoy reading your comments and kudos very much. This is my first story I've ever written so I hope you guys are enjoying reading it as much as I am writing it.


	3. Three

Carmilla was annoyed. Laura could see it in her face, and she could hear it in her voice: “What are you doing here? You can’t be here! You don’t even like horses!”

Well, this was a bit more awkward than Laura originally anticipated.  She frowned and bit her lip, Carmilla’s words echoing back to her; what was she doing here?  At this point, Laura didn’t even know herself.  She opened her mouth to speak but only a strangled sound came out. 

It suddenly struck her, just a bit too late, that this might look a little stalker-ish.

Denise shot a look back and forth between Carmilla and the gaping Laura before reprimanding Carmilla with a stern, “Dr. Karnstein!  Where are your manners?”

Carmilla’s gaze snapped from Laura instantly and a sheepish expression took up residence on her face.  She put her hands in the back pockets of her jeans, and drug the toe of her Dubarry boot against the spotless rubber matted floor with all of the charm of a properly chastised eight year old.  

“Um,” she said grudgingly, “sorry. That was rude.”  She directed this at Laura, before turning to Denise. “I met Laura at a party and since she said she didn’t like horses, I didn’t really expect…” she looked back in Laura’s direction with an accusing expression, “to see her again.”

Denise looked between the both of them before sighing audibly.

“Well you’re acting no better than my thirteen year old son Cody when he has a crush on a girl!’ Denise put both hands on her hips and jutted her bottom lip out in challenge.

_Damn. Denise was out for blood_. Laura thought with a little wince. “It’s okay, Denise.” she interjected, looking at the taller woman with a bit of a cajoling smile. “I think Dr. Karnstein is just very surprised to see me again. I did make quite the case for my lack of desire to be around horses.”

Denise snorted and turned back to the big brown horse in the stall.  He was eying them with a bored expression, lower lip drooping open, a thin line of drool starting to run out, and his tail swishing occasionally at non-existent bugs.  His whole demeanor was very _whatever man_. All he needed was a Free Love bumper sticker on his large brown rump.

Denise eyed them both for a long minute before rubbing her hands together, with a little smile playing on her lips.

“Well,” she said, “I know how Dr. Karnstein can make it up to you. Dr. K, why don’t you show Laura how to brush Diablo here while I go get the horses I want you to pull some coggins on?”

Carmilla started to make a few noises of protest but Denise shut her down with a stern, “Oh no, I absolutely insist.” And with that, she turned on her heel and strode away from the both of them.  

From the tilt of her head, and the jerky sway of her walk, Laura could almost swear the older woman was laughing. 

* * *

There was a long stretch of silence between Carmilla and Laura that was painful.  Laura, never one to let a breath of quiet last too long, broke it with a too loud, “So, um, I didn’t know horses wore cardigans? And how do you put one on? Is that a special vet job? Must be very diff--”

She stopped talking when she saw that Carmilla’s lower lip was twitching. Was she going to cry? Right as that thought passed through Laura’s mind, Carmilla burst into an incredulous snort. It bubbled deep in the back of her throat, and she placed a hand over her mouth to try to quell it.

“Horses… don’t… wear… cardigans…” She finally managed to squeeze out between fits of giggles. “She said coggins. It’s like a horse-y rabies tag, except it’s not for rabies, but for a horse version of infectious disease.”

Oh. So no cardigans for horses. _Bummer._  Laura shrugged slightly.  “Oh that makes more sense then. I still think horses should have cardigans; it gets cold here in Virginia.”

Carmilla, recovered from her uncharacteristic mirth, just nodded as she approached the stall. “They do wear blankets, but they are tailored to fit them. There are all different types of horse blankets, but really horses naturally are very well suited for winter weather; there was a study done last year…” Her voice trailed off, she seemed to catch herself in the middle of an old habit, one she was trying to break.  “Ah, I’m rambling. I do that a lot. I guess I better get you started with Di.”

“Well if you have better things to do, I can just--” Laura started.

“--if Denise tells me to help you brush Di, then I’ll help you brush Di.” Carmilla finished for her.

Laura couldn’t help but feel surprised.  Carmilla didn’t strike Laura as someone who was easily ordered around, and yet she was doing Denise’s bidding without any protest.

“Why?”

Laura’s curiosity sometimes got the better of her, and her journalist training did not help her control her impulses.

Carmilla turned her head and gazed at Laura for a moment with those dark mysterious eyes of hers. Laura couldn’t help but feel herself starting to get lost in them.  They were like two warm amber pools, soft veins of gold and purple running across a coffee colored backdrop.  

“Well,” she said, “Denise used to be my riding instructor when I was a kid. I learned not to argue with her.”

“She taught you to ride horses?” Laura asked with mild surprise.

“Amongst other things.”  Carmilla waved a hand dismissively.

Instantly, Laura’s interest was piqued.

“Like… what other things?”

Well. Fair question. Carmilla was gay. Denise was hot... in like a mom way or something.

Carmilla sighed. “I don’t know, how to be a decent person I guess.”

“A lesson she’s still clearly trying to finish teaching.” Laura challenged.

“The concepts are challenging when the variables are vast.” Carmilla quipped right back.

“Touche.” Laura replied with a grin.

Carmilla returned the smile shyly, and they stood there staring at each other for a moment, before Carmilla broke eye contact and entered the stall.  Laura had a way of making her feel… strange. Inadequate wasn’t the right word, but it was a peculiar sensation, almost like she was cracking her open at the center and reading everything greedily that spilled out against Carmilla’s will.  She slipped a leather contraption onto Diablo’s head before turning her head and catching Laura’s confused expression.

“Is that like a horsey harness?” Laura asked innocently.

Carmilla made that snort sound again.  Laura was beginning to realize it meant she accidentally used what Denise referred to as “non horse person” terminology. However Carmilla’s tone wasn’t condescending or irritable when she replied. “Yes. Well kind of, we call it a halter and we hook this rope to it.”  She gestured to a long braided nylon rope that was bright blue and very clean.

“A horse leash!” Laura beamed.

“Close. It’s called a leadrope.” Carmilla corrected.

“Leadrope,” Laura repeated obediently.  Her eagerness to learn betraying her fear of the large beast.

“Yes, leadrope. Okay, I’m going to bring him out now.”

Laura backed up quickly. “Um, maybe you should leave him in there. You know, so he’s contained, or whatever.”

Carmilla cocked an eyebrow. “Scared of little Diablo?”

“Little! He’s MASSIVE!”

Carmilla made that snort sound again. “He’s only fifteen hands. My horse is two whole hands bigger.”

“Wait, what? Hands?  He’s got fifteen hands?” Laura peered at the large brown beast and wondered just where all these hands were situated.

“Horses are measured in hands. Each hand equals four inches, so a horse who is fifteen hands is technically sixty inches or five feet tall.” Carmilla’s tone wasn’t haughty, in fact she seemed to enjoy the opportunity to educate.  Her patience infinite when it came to all things equine.

“Oh, he just looks so big…” Laura said still eyeballing the brown horse nervously.  “And if he did have fifteen hands…”

“He’s not, and he doesn’t. I promise. He’s two inches shy of being a pony. Here back up and I’ll teach you to lead him.”

“Lead him! With his little horse leash? I think I’ll need a longer rope.” Laura’s voice went up an octave but Carmilla just smiled in response.  “Can’t he lead himself with one of his fifteen hands?”

Carmilla just rolled her eyes. “He has hooves not hands.”

“You’ll be fine,” she assured Laura before walking the horse out of the stall and into the immaculate rubber matted barn aisle.  

For a moment they stood there, horse and human, sizing one another up, just Laura and the horse before she cleared her throat with a nervous cough. “So what do I hold onto?” Her voice had gotten a little huskier, fear gripped her belly in it’s claws as she thought about that trail ride, oh so long ago….

Carmilla stood beside her, taking her hands gently in her own and showing Laura how to hold the leadrope. “Here, this technique is call the Hold It and Fold It.  You fold this rope up like so and hold onto this part right below the halter. Never wrap the lead rope around your fingers or you could lose one,” she warned.

“Lose a finger!” Laura’s voice trembled.

“Only if you wrap the leadrope around your hand, hold it just like I’ve shown you and you’ll be fine. Now when you feel confident, start to walk forward and apply a slight bit of pressure to the line.” Carmilla’s voice had that relaxed lazy tone again.  She was a good teacher; patient, fair and kind.

Laura took a few hesitant steps forward before she realized the horse wasn’t going to eat her immediately and her pace got a little stronger and more confident. Diablo followed her obediently like a trained dog.

“This isn’t so bad,” Laura said, right as she tripped over a raised ledge and fell flat on her face.

* * *

 “Laura, Laura, can you hear me Laura?”

Carmilla’s beautiful face came into focus as Laura came to her senses a minute or two later.  Just behind Carmilla’s thick dark curls, a big brown nose was hovering worriedly, Diablo’s cocoa colored eyes expressive with concern.  He nudged Carmilla’s shoulder before stretching his muzzle toward Laura, as if he were going to get a closer look.

“It’s okay, Di.” Carmilla reassured him before turning to look at Laura.  Even she had to admit despite her better judgement, she thought Laura was very pretty.  The other girl’s soft caramel color hair had fallen to either side of her shoulders, and even though her face was screwed up into a pained expression, there was something about those thick brows and the giant loopy ocher curls that framed that soft round face.

Laura groaned. “Wha - what happened? Did I fall?”

“You hit your head pretty hard.” Carmilla said, wrinkling her nose as she reached out to touch the spot on Laura’s head that had met rubber covered cement.  Her fingertips felt soft warm skin before she jerked them back as if she’d been burned, a tingling sensation right at the pads of her digits.  

“Mmm,” Laura responded after a brief pause. “Did I?”  She reached out to touch her forehead where a numb sensation was growing.  “Doesn’t hurt. Not yet.”

Carmilla’s expression changed slightly. “Do you know what day it is?”

“Monday,” Laura replied dreamily. “You volunteer on Mondays. _Need to go on a Monday…_ ”

Carmilla quirked a thinly arched eyebrow. “And just how do you know that?”

“Googled you.” Laura waved a hand, making a motion to express her desire to sit up. “Forgot your name, had to go convince LaF to get it…”

“You googled me?” Carmilla said incredulously, before pushing Laura’s shoulder slightly.  “Just lay back down for a second. See if you can follow my finger.”

Laura grunted and grabbed Carmilla’s hand with one of her own. “I’m fine, I’m fine. I’m not exactly comfortable lying on the floor with a horse less than three feet from my very vulnerable body.”

Carmilla laughed, “You’ve got to stop being afraid of Diablo. I’m pretty sure he tried to catch you on your way down.”

“Catch me?” Laura’s hand gripped Carmilla’s a little tighter at the thought.

“Relax, cupcake, “ Carmilla said with a roll of her eyes, “horses aren’t predators and humans don’t taste as nice as carrots. Diablo is a gentleman and a scholar.” She looked to where Laura’s hand was tightly wound around her own, and frowned at the rush of heat where skin met skin.  She squeezed Laura’s hand slightly before gently disentangling them.  “Come on, sit up, before Denise comes back and thinks I pushed you.”

It was Laura’s turn to quirk an eyebrow. “Oh? Is that how your wife fell madly in love with you? Do you treat your girls like a six year old boy on the school yard?”

Carmilla snorted. “Something like that. If she were here now, she would probably find this entire situation hilarious.”

“Well, why don’t you call her and tell her?” Laura replied before pulling herself into a sitting position.  She clutched her head in both hands with a groan; there was a throbbing pain just behind her left temple that echoed all the way across to her right one.  She almost completely missed Carmilla’s soft reply.  Almost.

“I wish I could.”

* * *

It took a few minutes for Laura to gather herself enough to stand and resume the walk back to the horse grooming station.  Carmilla didn’t protest when Laura didn’t take the leadrope from her, as they both figured it might be safer to attach Diablo to something immobile before Laura started messing with him again. 

Despite a mild throbbing, Laura’s head felt clear and her thoughts ran rampant.  What had Carmilla meant by that strange comment from before? _I wish I could._ It implied that she and her wife were not on speaking terms.  Had they separated?  Either by voluntary means or otherwise?  

Laura was burning with questions, and it was taking all of her willpower not to begin interrogating Carmilla immediately.  She knew that it would be rude to pry, especially when Carmilla thought she wasn’t entirely functional, otherwise she may not have made the comment at all.

“Laura!” Carmilla was staring at her with a mildly concerned expression.

“Mm,” Laura’s head snapped in her direction.

“Are you okay? I’ve said your name like five times.”

“Oh,” Laura said reaching up to feel her head lightly, “yeah. Yes! Sorry, I guess I was lost in thought. What were you saying?”

“I was saying that the very first brush we use is called the curry.”  She motioned to the circular rubber tool in her hand.  

“Right,” Laura said, “the curry.”

“You use it on the horse in a circle, just like the shape of the brush.” She pressed the tool against Diablo’s soft brown coat, running it in a light circle against his fur, while dust and dirt rose up in a soft cloud.  

Laura watched her movements, noting the long graceful fingers and the way they elegantly guided the brush against the horse.  Diablo closed his eyes, relaxing under Carmilla’s touch.  For a moment, woman and horse were lost in a silent moment, enjoying the time spent together.  Carmilla ran it down his neck, against his shoulder, and along her back with the ease of a practiced hand.

Breaking the spell, a warm voice called out, “Ay! How goes it now?”

Laura and Carmilla turned to see Denise walking up.  Her expression was unreadable, but a hint of a smile played at her lips.

“Good!”

“Great!”

Carmilla and Laura suspiciously answered at the same time.

Denise looked from the woman brushing the horse, to the woman standing slightly away as if she were trying to blend into the background and the small smile broke into a bigger grin.  “Oh, yes, looks like it’s going _very_  well.  I’ll take over for you Carm,” she said.  Carmilla’s expression brightened and she quickly strode over to hand the curry off, and effectively get rid of Laura and the confusing feelings that went along with her.

“But,” Denise broke in before she took the brush, “I think it would be a great idea if Laura came back next week and spent the day with you as your assistant.”

Carmilla’s eyes widened, “That doesn’t sound like a good idea at all.  I need a pair of experienced hands; we’ll be handling the new rescues from New Holland.”

Denise smile flickered. “Oh, I think you’ll find Laura has more gumption than you’re giving her credit for. I think you two would make a good team.” 

Carmilla fell silent. She knew there was no sense in arguing, even though she was burning with silent white hot protest.  She knew exactly what Denise was doing… After all, she’d done this once before…

 

* * *

 “I can’t believe she’s playing matchmaker AGAIN!” Carmilla fumed at Perry as she slammed a palm down on the heavy oak dining table.

They were in the plantation’s dining room, a delicious dinner set out for their usual family style Monday dinners.  Carmilla had spent all of it complaining about Denise’s obvious attempts at setting her up with Laura.  

Perry’s eyes were shining and she hadn’t said much, only hummed and nodded at all the right moments.  Carmilla ranted into dessert, and it was only after a few bites of Perry’s homemade apple pie that she settled enough for Perry to interject.

“I mean, you have to admit, the last time Denise set you up it led to marriage.”

Carmilla nearly choked and after a short coughing fit, she shook her head. “That is exactly what I’m--”

“Afraid of?” Perry cut her off with a small smile.

“No! It’s just not what I want right now. Ell’s been gone--”

“Two years, Carmilla. Plenty of time to start thinking about moving on. She would want you to, hell she made me promise I would make you start dating again. She should have known that I was making a promise I couldn’t keep; after all, you’re the most stubborn person I know.” 

Carmilla stood up violently from the table. “I get it! I’m supposed to instantly forget someone I spent a huge part of my life with and try to start over with someone new like it never even happened! I just can’t do that! I’m sorry, but I can’t. I’m not going on Monday and that’s it!”

“Carmilla, I--” Perry tried but Carmilla had already fled from the room.

Leaning back in her chair, Perry rubbed her eyes tiredly and sighed. “Oh, Ell… How could you leave me here alone with her?”

* * *

“Laura! What you did is considered stalking in some states!” LaFontaine pressed their lips together in a frown.

“I know, I know,” Laura waved a hand. She was sitting on her comfy armchair, a bag of ice pressed against her forehead.

LaFontaine walked across the room, handing her four ibuprofen pills and a bottle of water.

“I guess I just needed to see her again, it’s hard to explain… I couldn’t even remember much of what she said when we first talked at that party, she told me her name I know that, but I forgot it… It was like-- like I wasn’t really listening to what she was saying but instead how she was saying it.  There was something about her eyes, I don’t know, I guess I just felt compelled--” 

“To follow her out to a horse rescue, fall flat on your face in front of her, and then be set up to spend an entire day with her when she thinks you’re a clumsy stalker?” LaFontaine said a bit sarcastically.

“Yes.” Laura groaned.  “What am I going to do LaFontaine? She ran away from me. I tried to look for her to tell her I wouldn’t come back if she didn’t want me to, but she just disappeared.”

“I guess you’re just going to have to go back,” LaFontaine said after a stretch of silence.

“You think so?” Laura said turning to meet their gaze.

“Yeah,” LaFontaine said slowly, “I mean if you feel a connection to her, then you should explore it.”

Laura smiled and then nodded. “I guess you’re right, I should probably go back.”

“Well, I mean, you can only go up from here. She already thinks you’re a clumsy creeper stalker so there’s no shred of dignity left to lose!”

Laura tossed a throw pillow at them before she started laughing too.

* * *

 


	4. Four

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The one where we meet Mango...

“I thought you weren’t going to the horse rescue today?”

Perry’s voice broke the morning quiet as she watched Carmilla tiptoe through the foyer.  She was seated in her office which faced the hallway leading from the kitchen to the living room, and the foyer was perpendicular to her left edge of her doorframe.  

It was a strategic place, giving her full view of the walkways to the main rooms in the house and it kept her thumb on a high traffic area.  Perfect to keep an eye on the comings and goings of not only Carmilla but any visiting clients as well.  

Carmilla was startled by the verbal intrusion, and she froze at the sound of the first syllable of Perry’s voice.  She stood still for a second, her fingers just shy of a hold on the door handle before her shoulders slumped; she was caught red handed.  There would be no escaping without explanation.  No use in making a break for it.

“I have to check the New Holland rescues.  Who knows what Denise had them bring back this time?  I want to get there early in case it takes more time than usual, especially if that old bat attaches the newbie to me like an anchor.” Carmilla’s tone was annoyed, but Perry saw right through it.

Before she could help herself, she said, “You _want_ to go and see that Laura girl again!”

Carmilla whirled around. “No I don’t! It’s about the horses, and that’s it!”

Perry nodded quickly, backpedaling and just trying to save face.  “Oh yeah, of course it is. I’m sorry.”

Carmilla eyed her like a bull seeing red, figuring that Perry was being sarcastic. “You still think I want to go,” she said rather hotly, “well if I didn’t have to be there, I wouldn’t go at all! But I’m not going to put horses in danger just to prove you wrong!” And with that she spun on her heel and marched outside; Jack following obediently a few paces behind.

Perry sniggered into her palm. “The lady doth protest just a little too much,” she mumbled to herself before returning to her work.  She was organizing the client list, deleting old information from the system, and pretending to ignore her phone which was buzzing with texts.  Occasionally she would angle her eyeline just so she could read one of the first lines in the texts, and she flushed bright red at the words.  Something about wanting to give her a very sensual back rub tonight...

It was a good thing Carmilla was too busy with her own lacking love life to notice Perry’s heating up romance.  Otherwise it would be Perry who would have some explaining to do, indeed…

* * *

Laura groaned as she checked her watch.  7:45 am.  If she didn’t leave now, she would be late!  She was supposed to be at the rescue at 8:30 am to help unload the newest auction intakes.

Denise bought horses from sales all around the country and transported them to various quarantine locations that were affiliated with her rescue operation.  The ones who came to her Virginia farm were the worst case scenarios and often were transported to high profile vet clinics before they could come home and be treated and cared for by Dr. Karnstein; and she had said this newest group was a special case as they had been part of an SPCA seizure.

Apparently it was very hush hush, the horses were dropped off at the auction in Pennsylvania against a court order and there would be a lot of red tape surrounding them.  They had to be housed at a farm in Pennsylvania for a week before they were strong enough to make the five hour trailer ride to Virginia, and Laura couldn’t imagine what sort of horrors they had seen or been through.  She did know that she intended to ask Denise if she could cover the case for one of her journalism classes, since it sounded both interesting and wasn’t something any of her other classmates had done before.

Her phone buzzed indicating she received a text message, and she checked it quickly as she pulled up the zippers to her paddock boots.

**Do you have time to talk tonight?**

She grimaced.  It was from Danny and she knew Danny intended to do a lot more than talk.  She typed back a quick response before heading out the door and toward her car.

**No. Volunteering at the horse rescue.  Then going out to dinner with LaF.**

* * *

The drive over wasn’t as long this time since she knew her way.  She turned into the rescue just behind the massive horse trailer housing the new horses.  It was an open type trailer with slats and bars, and she could see the horses milling about, loose and nervous as they bounced down the gravel driveway.  She rolled her window down just to hear a frightened whinny echoing from the depths of the trailer.

As they rounded the bend and pulled up to the horse rescue’s parking lot, she saw Carmilla sitting patiently on the bumper of her truck, a red husky sitting obediently at her feet.  As the trailer grew closer, Carmilla stood and strode around her truck to mess in one of the many compartments, reaching in for some piece of equipment no doubt.  

Laura pulled into the same place she parked the last time, sliding the car into park before turning to see the great trailer come to a halt just a few hundred feet away.  There was a great whoosh from the airbrakes and the horses whinnied nervously again.

Opening her door and standing up, she found herself making eye contact with Carmilla, who immediately frowned when she recognized her.  “Nice to see you too,” Laura murmured before heading over to stand at Carmilla’s side.

“Are these the new guys?” She called to Carmilla before wincing inwardly.

_Well yeah, Laura, obviously._

Carmilla, to her credit, just nodded and pointed to the bumper of her truck. “Sit and wait here. I don’t know how much training they have, if any at all, and I don’t need you getting in the way.”

Laura started to protest as a knee-jerk reaction before she remembered she knew next to nothing about horses. “Yeah,” she agreed. “Good idea.”

She sat down the plastic bumper and the husky immediately rose to his feet, presenting himself to her with a regal lick of her hand. “Aren’t you handsome?” She greeted before turning to Carmilla, “What’s his name?”

“Jack.” Carmilla answered with an uncharacteristic smile before turning to walk over to meet the hauler, a tall broad man with a ridiculously long handlebar mustache.  “Hey Johnny,” she greeted as if they were old friends, “whatcha got for me today?”

“Three colts, wild as march hares, and a filly. Filly could be pregnant, she’s been running loose with them colts all year long.  They’re all related and interbred.  Horrible place they came from, the stink of death is all over them.  The filly is the real challenge, reared like the black stallion when I tried to load her.  Auction guys used a cattle prod on her to get to run through the sales ring; she’s got electric burn marks all over her body and a look in her eye that says she don’t want no part of us.  Don’t think you’ll be rehabilitating her…” He shook his head grimly and spat on the gravel in disgust.

Carmilla rubbed a hand against the back of her neck, a frown playing on the corner of her lips. “Okay Johnny, we’ll see what we can do for them.  You think you can back up to the chute with your big rig?”

Johnny grinned broadly. “Oh yeah, love, you know I can. Can’t do much, but I can drive the hell out of a truck. Forward, backward, up and down, you know I’m your man.”

Carmilla returned his smile and together they made plans to back the trailer up to a tall ten foot chute, where Laura guessed the horses were ran into and then separated into individual pens so the rescue workers could evaluate them.

It took about ten minutes, but they finally got the trailer lined up with the chute, and Laura found herself fearful for Carmilla’s safety as the horses, dark brown and red blurs, threw themselves at the walls of the trailer, desperate for escape.

With a great wrenching squeal of metal on metal, Carmilla opened the back gate of the trailer and the horses came thundering out in a great rush of noise and bodies.  They slapped together as they pushed against the walls, and Carmilla climbed the panels to open the first gate, letting two of the colts rush inside.  She called to Johnny as she worked, gesturing for him to pick up a long pole with a plastic bag attached to it, and he used this to guide the remaining filly and colt into separate pens while Carmilla shut their gates with matching bangs.  

Once that was done, the two pens of colts were opened and they were run through the chute a final time so all three could end up together in the largest pen.  The filly, a lonely brown shape, was in the pen closest to Laura, and she found herself drawn to the blur of hooves and fur. Her steps taking her to the edge of the little paddock, peering through the slats to see the filly whirling around inside, kicking up her heels and whinnying frantically for her friends.  On her fourth turn around the circular pen, she spotted Laura and slid to a stop.

For a second, horse and human sized one another up.  The filly was much smaller than Diablo, and she was a shade of brown that could only be described as Hershey’s milk chocolate.  There wasn’t a stitch of white on her, she was deep cocoa brown all over but her mane and tail were a deep true black.  Her eyes were big and expressive, darker than her coat, and ringed white with fear.  Laura could see the foamy sweat on her neck and shoulders, and the trembling that shook the little filly almost broke Laura’s heart.

She stretched her long elegant neck toward Laura, her head lowering and turning so one eye could see her fully and let out a soft whicker.  It was full of anxious questions. _‘Hello.  Who are you? Where am I?  Where are my friends?’_

Laura couldn’t explain it.  She’d heard about it with dogs and cats, but she immediately felt an invisible tug toward this scrawny little creature.  Her belly was huge and swollen, but the rest of her was just bones.  Her hips stuck out like coat hangers, and her tail was matted together so it resembled a baseball bat.  She swung it wildly here or there, the slap slap of it against her rump loud in the ensuing quiet after all the racket of the unloading process.  There were mats and tangles in her mane too, and it gave her a wild look, as if she belonged on a beach somewhere; a wild horse untouched by human hands.  There were marks on her everywhere, some were dark with dried blood, and others were clearly old and healing or crusty with infection.

Without meaning to, Laura heard herself talking softly to the little filly, “Hey girl… Hello.  I’m Laura.  You don’t have a name I don’t think, but you’re very pretty.  Did you know that, huh?”

At the sound of Laura’s voice, the filly took a step forward, still eying her as if she were deciding whether to deem Laura friend or foe.  She lowered her head to her gray hooves and let out a loud snort as if she were trying to talk tough, and then jumped at the sound of her own voice.  She trotted a small circle to find the source of the sound before turning back to look at Laura again.  _Was that you or me?_ Her expression clearly said.

Laura laughed immediately at her silly antics and the filly settled, tilting her head and then shaking it once or twice before doing something quite odd.  She moved her lips, her pink tongue escaping from the depth of her maw before disappearing again in a series of quick motions.  Her ears flicked forward, and the white disappeared from her eye.  Laura wasn’t a horse expert of course, but she kind of thought this little girl liked the sound of her laugh.

“Come here, girl.  Let me get a better look at you.” Laura called to the filly, sticking her arm through the slats and offering it to the her.  Immediately the little brown creature began to walk boldly to her, her ears pricked forward and her eyes softer now.  For whatever reason, she decided this two legged creature required immediate investigation.

She came within two paces before slowing her step, one hoof held questioning just above the earth, her head turned and she regarded Laura with just one eye again.  Laura remembered Carmilla had said that horses had binocular vision, not monocular vision.  They saw everything differently out of each individual eye.  Now, Laura realized, the filly was checking her out from another angle, making sure her first glance hadn't missed anything.

She must have passed, because the filly closed the distance between them and sniffed Laura’s outstretched fingers.  She turned her head and lifted her top lip high into the air, looking for all the world like a horse who had smelled something hysterically funny.  Giggling at her reaction, Laura reached her hand further, just below the filly’s muzzle and said, “Do I smell funny?  It’s Mangos.  Mango lotion, I mean.  I usually use vanilla or cinnamon scented, but the mango was on sale for half price so I thought why not!”  

The little brown horse lowered her head, gently nosing Laura’s wrist as she inhaled the smell of her.  She moved her nose down the length of Laura’s arm to her shoulder, inspecting her as if she were the most curious thing she had ever seen.  They might have stood there forever, getting to know one another, just the little filly and Laura, had a voice not interrupted them.

“What are you doing?”  It wasn’t quite a yell, just a fierce hiss and Laura started.  The filly was surprised too, and she shied away from the sound, galloping to the other end of the pen with her eyes rimmed in white again.

Laura turned around to see Carmilla a few paces off.  The veterinarian's expression was downright thunderous, but Laura paid it no heed.  “You scared her!” She said reproachfully as she gestured to her new horse friend.  “She liked my lotion!”

For a second, Carmilla was distracted, “She what?”

Laura flushed and then repeated, “She liked my lotion.  I think.  I don’t know, she did this funny thing with her lip…”  She trailed off, looking back to the filly who was watching her again.

“A flehmen response.”  Carmilla said quietly.

“A what?” Laura turned her gaze back to Carmilla.

“It’s called a flehmen response.  It means she thought you smelled weird and she was trying to get a better whiff.”

“Oh,” Laura said.  “Well maybe I’ll wear my vanilla scented one next time. I don’t want her to think I’m weird.”

Carmilla hummed in response before moving closer.  Her tone taking on a stern note.  “You could have been seriously hurt.  She’s not handled and we know nothing about her.  You also can’t touch any other horse here without changing clothes because she could be contaminated with who knows what…”

“She’s not dangerous! And she’s not contaminated!” Laura broke in as soon as Carmilla paused for breath.  Carmilla eyed her with what was definite surprise.  Laura swallowed briefly before adding more quietly, “I mean she’s not crazy.  She’s just scared.  I’m not a horse expert, but she wants to say hello. She’s just worried we might try to hurt her.”

Carmilla held up a hand.  “Whoa, easy trigger.  I don’t think she’s crazy at all.  She has every reason to fear people.  See those patches of missing hair where the skin is showing?  That’s from an electric cattle prod.  It’s how they got her into the trailer to take her to auction.”

Laura made a horrified sound.  “Poor baby!  Those people should go to jail for animal abuse!”

Carmilla smiled.  “I wish it was that simple, cupcake.”

“Well it should be,” Laura turned around to rest her arms on the board, “the people who hurt Mango are the worst kinds of people!”

“Mango?” Carmilla cocked an eyebrow.

“Yes, that’s what I’m going to call her.  Mango.  It suits her, doesn’t it?” Laura smiled and held her hand out again, gesturing for the filly to come over again.  

The little filly whickered softly, nervously eying Carmilla before taking a few hesitant steps.  “Come on little Mango,” Laura called.

“You can’t just name her.  You’re going to get attached and that’s not such a good thing to do with a fresh intake… She could get sick, or…”  Carmilla trailed off, shoving her hands in her pockets.

“Or what?”  Laura replied distractly, still motioning to the horse and cooing every time the little filly took a step forward.

“It’s just not a good idea, okay?” Carmilla finished lamely.

“Well too bad.  Mango and I are going to be best friends.  I'm going to visit her every day.  What do we need to do for her? Ooh, and when do I get to go in there with her?”

Carmilla just sighed in response.  “I miss when you were scared of horses.”

* * *

“She’s named that filly out there.”

Denise turned around to see Carmilla standing in the doorway.  The older woman put down the paperwork Johnny had left for her and motioned for Carmilla to take a seat in one of the worn comfortable looking chairs facing her desk.  She leaned back in her own rolling chair, before crossing a knee over the other with a smile.

“Who has?”

“Laura.  She named that filly Mango.” Carmilla took a seat, rubbing the back of her neck again, a habit she did when stressed.

“A good name. Mango.” Denise scooted her chair forward to pick up the coggins that came along with the new rescued filly.  “Says she’s three.”

“Two, maybe, but not three.  Haven’t had a chance to check her teeth to see how old she truly is, but far too young to have that giant pregnant belly.  Johnny told me the stallion was eighteen hands.  Mango is just barely fourteen hands.  You and I both know what that means.  A tiny mother bred with a giant father usually makes for a dead mother with a too big baby.  She’s going to get her heart broken.”  Carmilla said crossly.

“You called her Mango.” Denise said pointedly.

“You’re changing the subject.” Carmilla snapped. “I don’t think it’s fair to let the newbie fall in love with the least likely to survive!”

“Why? Because it’s something Ell would do?”

Carmilla went totally still, and Denise knew she’d pushed too far.  Instead of a response, Carmilla simply stood and walked out of the room.  Denise sighed heavily, watching her go, then turned to look out the window.  

She saw Laura standing still at Mango’s pen, both arms reached through as she scratched Mango’s rump vigorously.  The little filly was wiggling it just to the left and to the right happily as Laura reached those elusive itchy spots the horse couldn’t reach herself.

As Carmilla strode out from the shelter of the barn toward the pair of them, Laura called over her shoulder, “Look Carmilla, I can make it look like Mango’s twerking!”  

The happy smile on Laura’s face and the relaxed expression on Mango’s said it all.  

Denise understood Carmilla’s hesitation to let the new volunteer fall in love with the least handled and trained horse, especially since she carried the highest risk, but who was Denise to tell Laura what to do with her heart?  Sometimes a connection is immediate and unexplainable, and deep down, Denise knew Carmilla’s protest had more to do with Laura herself and her own feelings toward her than Laura’s budding bond with Mango.

Turning back to her paperwork, she decided it was best to just let Laura and Carmilla work it out between the two of them.  After all, that was what she did all those years ago, with a pair of teenage girls who couldn’t seem to get along…

* * *

Laura, true to her word, showed up on Tuesday and diligently cleaned stalls alongside another volunteer until she was allowed to go visit Mango.  She took a small folding chair out of her car, and a book she needed to read for one of her english lit classes, and sat happily outside Mango’s pen while she read aloud to the little filly.  

Mango, seeing Laura, immediately trotted over and proceeded to stand as close as possible to her little makeshift camp, pressing her side against the wooden slats and occasionally swishing her tail at flies.  Sometimes when Laura reached a climactic part in the story, Mango would turn her head and shake it as if to say, ' _Go on! What happens next?'_

Laura figured it had to do with the rising excited tone of her voice, but it was still pretty cute either way.

They repeated this process for two weeks with Laura visiting nearly daily before Carmilla began to thaw her frosty exterior around Laura.  Even she had to admit, the girl was dedicated to the little brown horse.  

Carmilla began making a point to handle Mango on the days she knew Laura would be there, and during Mango’s first exam, Laura proudly repeated anything she deemed a positive result.

“Heart rate is good.” Carmilla said.

“You hear that Mango, you’ve got an excellent heart rate!” Laura beamed at her.

Carmilla tried to roll her eyes, but she found a hint of a smile playing on her lips.

“Skin is looking better. Coat feels softer and healthier too.”

Laura beamed. “I brought out coconut oil for Denise to put in Mango’s hair. It must be working!”

As Carmilla proceeded to finish up examining Mango, she turned to see Laura standing hesitantly by the gate to Mango’s pen.  “When can I,” she said, “When can I go in there with her?”

Carmilla shook her head.  “Maybe when she’s a little more trained. A few more weeks.”

Laura’s face fell but she recovered quickly. “Okay, that’s okay. I’ve got time.”

“Come on,” Carmilla said after placing all of her equipment back in her bag and giving Mango an affectionate pat.  “We need to go get hay for Mango and the other colts.  Also we need to fill up their water troughs. They are looking a little low.”

Laura eagerly sprang to action at the idea of something she could do. “Okay!”

They walked in silence to the separate shed that housed the hay and grain for the quarantine horses, and Carmilla thought for a second that maybe they would enjoy a few long moments of companionable silence…

“Mango wants a harness thing.”  Laura said suddenly to Carmilla, as they piled Mango’s hay high into a wheelbarrow.  Carmilla jumped at the sound of Laura’s voice just behind her ear.

“What?” Carmilla said in response as she grunted with the effort to keep the cart from tipping over.

“She wants to go on walks.  She needs a harness thing.  Where can I get her one that will fit her?” Laura repeated excitedly.

Carmilla dropped the handles of the wheelbarrow with a start. “You want to walk the completely wild horse around when you can’t even take Diablo twenty feet?”

Laura blushed. “Well, I - Diablo is a very nice horse but he isn’t Mango. I want to learn to walk Mango on a horse leash.  But I want her to have her own.  A yellow one.  I don’t want her to have to use another horse’s stuff.  I’ll buy her one.  Where can I get one for her?”

Laura was already walking ahead, eager to get back to Mango and give her the hay, which Laura had referred to as ‘ _Mango Noms_ ’.

“Laura,” Carmilla said sharply, “You cannot walk Mango on a horse leash. I mean, _on a leadrope_.  Not until you know how to walk Diablo safely.”

Laura turned around. “Oh... okay. Well, can you teach me to walk him then?  Maybe tomorrow? I’ve got to learn so Mango can see all the cool stuff here. I want to take her to the grooming station and paint her nails. She wants yellow nails with black polka dots to match her hair. I’ve got to get those mats out of her hair too...”

Carmilla rolled her eyes.  “She’s in quarantine, she can’t go anywhere outside her pen for twenty one more days.  And finally you need to know how to handle a trained horse both on the ground and in the saddle before you can handle Mango.  She needs training and so do you.”

“Okay. So how do I start getting trained? And who needs to train Mango? Will you do it?” Laura’s simple acceptance of everything Carmilla said should have been annoying, but it wasn’t.  Carmilla could see the eagerness radiating from her.  All she wanted to do was spend time with Mango and teach her things.  She’d completely forgotten her original mission (whatever that was) in coming to the rescue, and it was all about Mango now.

Carmilla just sighed. “Come on, Mango’s probably getting hungry.”

Laura bounced along behind her, chattering happily about Mango’s yellow ‘harness thingy’ and her plans to teach Mango all about being a trained horse.

When they reached the pen, Carmilla dropped the wheelbarrow with a loud bang.  It tipped over to the side, spilling hay everywhere, but she paid it no mind.  Her eyes were on Mango, who was stretched out full on her side, looking every bit as dead as a doornail.

Laura jumped at the bang of the turned over cart, but her gaze followed Carmilla’s, and the cry was loud and anxious from her throat. “Mango!”


	5. Five

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> What happens to Mango... Sorry it took so long! I hope to have the next one up quicker!

Carmilla lived her life in a series of moments.

 

She can recall being three and staring down at the broken vase, the water staining the cream colored carpet an ugly gray.  The feeling of her arm being wrenched as she was spun around to stare upward at her furious mother.  The tall and slender woman began to berate her endlessly for her clumsiness.

 

She can recall being sixteen and staring down at the face of a girl.  Her head in her lap, Carmilla’s fingers working through the curls in her hair.  She’s smiling at her, before her lips open wider into devious laughter, and she says like a secret, “I could kiss you right now.”  Carmilla shakes her head shyly because she does and doesn’t want her to in the same instant and it’s a confusing myriad of emotions that she decides is best left to uncover another day.

 

She can recall being twenty three and staring down into the eyes of the woman she was to marry.  Ell’s laugh was loud in the almost empty church as Carmilla’s fingers shook with nerves, and Ell steadied her hand with her own.  She was wearing a calm serene smile.  “Relax.  It’s just me.  Breathe.”

 

From one moment to the next her thoughts leapt, memories like a film playing in her head.  Faces of people long gone, dead or whisked away from the pages of her life like someone had blown upon them.  She could feel each one turning and turning until she arrived into the present, and she watched as Laura climbed the nearly eight foot tall pen.  The other girl’s fingers wrenching hold between the wood, and her short little legs scampering upward and over as quickly as she could.

 

Mango lay deathly still.  Not even her tail twitched, and her sides were absent of the upward and downward motions of breath.  It seemed an eternity before Laura slid to a stop at her side, and her resulting cry of anguish was too loud in the deepening afternoon.

 

“There’s blood everywhere!”

 

The words forced Carmilla from her standstill and she was moving.  Her steps were graceful and sure-footed, and her manner was not unlike the animals she made her living healing.  Her tangled dark hair was as wild as a pinto pony’s mane, and she ran her fingers through it in a gesture of anxiety.  

 

She moved to the gate, finding it an easier entrance than Laura’s mad dash over the panels.  She was at Laura’s side in a moment, seeing the soft sand of the pen stained dark all around Mango’s hindquarters.

 

“It’s not blood,” she said immediately, studying the pattern.  “Her water’s broken.”

 

Laura’s gaze snapped to Carmilla’s own.  “Her baby is coming?”

 

Carmilla nodded.  “It’s too soon though.  Too soon.  And she’s so young…”  She trailed off, turning to look at Mango’s still form.  She could now see the shallow breaths the little filly took. She was alive, and that was enough to steady her hands.

 

“Laura go get Denise.”  She commanded sternly.  She refused to look at Laura’s anguished face, knowing that if she did, she might relent.

 

“No!” Laura replied immediately. “I want to stay with Mango.”

 

“Go get Denise.” Carmilla repeated stubbornly.  “You cannot help me with this, but she can.  I need tools to help Mango through this, and only Denise can give me those.  Go, quickly!”

 

Laura’s expression was grim but she couldn’t argue.  She was on her feet in a moment, moving quickly toward the gate and breaking into an outright run once she was past it.

 

Once she was safely out of earshot, Carmilla murmured to Mango.  “Okay Mango, it’s just you and me.  Let’s hope you’re strong enough to pull through this.”

 

The filly moaned in response, lifting her head, turning to look at her sides before lowering it back to the earth with a thump.  Light sweat began to break out along her shoulders, neck and hind quarters.  Carmilla ran her fingers through the silky mane to comfort her before turning back to lift her tail away from it’s tight clasp against the filly’s hindquarters.  She could see the yellow mark of the baby’s protective bag, knowing it would soon reveal two perfect little hooves. 

 

She could hear Laura’s feet hitting the gravel just before the barn doors and it stirred a memory within her involuntarily, and she was traveling back more than a decade ago…

 

* * *

 

 

“Carmilla, meet Ell.  Ell, Carmilla.”  Denise introduced the pair of them with a smile.

 

Carmilla studied her boots nervously before raising her eyes to find two azure ones blinking right back at her.  Ell was short and blonde, her hands were thrust into the pockets of her breeches, and expensive tall leather boots stopped just below her knee.  Carmilla could tell she came from money, not just from the brand name riding apparel that covered her from head to foot, but the practiced ease that radiated from her.

 

Carmilla was no stranger to money, her own parents were wealthy, and so she was not intimidated by Ell’s obvious wealth.  No it was something about the sparkle in the other girl’s eye, and the high tilt of her chin that betrayed what was surely a stubborn nature.  

 

They eyed each other for a moment before Denise elbowed Carmilla smartly.

 

“How do you do,” she stated in response quietly.  More an obligation than a question.  Dragging a foot across the gravel, she gave off an air of wanting to be anywhere but there.

 

Ell nodded in response, refusing to answer directly and there was another awkward beat of silence.

 

“Well, I can see you two are going to get on famously.” Denise said rather sarcastically.  “Why don’t you show her around Carmilla?  It will be good for you to have someone around your own age.” Denise’s smile was pointed and Carmilla knew there was no point in arguing.

 

“Yes, Denise.”  She agreed and turned on her heel.  She didn’t bother to look to see if Ell followed or not.  Her slumping shoulders suggested quite clearly that she didn’t care.  It was only the sound of Ell’s boots on the gravel that told her the other girl was indeed keeping pace.  Her long elegant strides in contrast to Carmilla’s shorter and choppier ones.

 

Carmilla muttered a few phases regarding the location of the rings, tack room, and office before leading the girl toward the paddocks.  Ell stopped abruptly at one of the stalls.  Carmilla turned and saw she was patting the nose of a tall elegant dapple gray mare Carmilla didn’t recognize

 

“Is she yours?” Carmilla breathed, admiring the long neck and dished face of the mare.

 

“Yes.” Ell replied simply.

 

“Oh.”  Carmilla said before she realized she was standing there awkwardly, watching this girl pat her horse.

 

“Um, do you want to finish the tour or?”

 

“You don’t seem like you’re interested in making friends.”  Ell observed.

 

“No,” Carmilla said after a moment, “I’m not.  But then again I’m not very good at it to begin with… I guess it’s hard to have interest in something you struggle with.”

 

Ell turned to look at her finally, her blue eyes bright with something Carmilla couldn’t name.  “Well that’s simply not true.  I struggle with all kinds of things I’m interested in.”

 

Carmilla quirked an eyebrow.  “Like?”

 

Ell threw back her head and laughed, and Carmilla found it to be almost musical.  “Wouldn’t you like to know?  Then I’d lose my air of mystery.”  She took a few steps forward, stopping just shy of Carmilla, and she reached out and booped a finger right on the bridge of Carmilla’s nose.  “No, I’ve got a few secrets I intend to keep.  Why don’t you continue your little tour?”

 

Carmilla swallowed.  She was suddenly aware that she was in the presence of someone who could toy with her like a cat might a small creature.  And this was no doubt alarming… But also, strangely exciting.

 

She turned with Ell in her wake, continuing down the stalls, introducing the various horses with a little more inflection in her usual quiet monotone.  Ell listened with interest, occasionally voicing a question here or there.  She was the perfect audience, totally enraptured, and Carmilla found herself growing more comfortable by the moment…

 

* * *

 

 

Laura returned without Denise at a pace that could only be called a controlled gallop. Carmilla thought it might be Laura’s version of a power walk.  The other girl bent down beside Mango without so much as a word to the vet, before beginning to untangle a knot in the filly’s mane.

 

“Is Denise on her way?”  Carmilla asked impatiently.

 

“Yes.”  Laura answered simply, her nimble fingers still at work, her expression eerily calm.

 

“Did you tell her to bring her tools?” Carmilla pressed.

 

“Yes.” Laura finished with the knot and moved to another tangle, her deft fingers gently but firmly encouraging the strands to separate.  

 

Carmilla closed her mouth with a snap and turned her eyes back to Mango.  Laura’s fingers were still working on the knots and rats in Mango’s mane and it occurred to Carmilla suddenly that she had been wanting to fix them all along.  She remembered how Laura was always talking about brushing Mango’s mane and tail and braiding it to help it grow longer and stronger.  There was something so gentle about the gesture now, so tender and loving that tears sprang to Carmilla’s eyes.  She blinked them away.

 

She did not have time to get emotional.

 

She turned back to the horse, her expression all business.

 

She worked quickly and quietly, only barking a few simple commands at Laura whenever she felt she needed help.  Laura was a quick study and surprisingly helpful.  She kept out of the way but was quick to offer assistance should Carmilla need it, and by the time Denise arrived, they were working like a well oiled team.

 

Denise set the tools down wordlessly and stepped back to watch Carmilla direct Laura on what she needed and when.  Mango’s tail was wrapped, her legs positioned and then the three of them retreated to a safe distance to let Mango do the rest in peace.

 

Laura sat cross legged, her eyes never leaving Mango’s still form, and she began to chew her cuticles in a nervous tic.  

 

Carmilla watched her for a moment before turning back to Mango.  The little pony’s sides were heaving now, and sweat drenched her entire body.  She strained, her legs jerking, before she laid still again.  Every inch of her body spoke of the tension and pain swirling around inside.

 

Labor was tough, but it was even tougher when the mother was just a baby herself.

 

As the minutes ticked by, Mango went through the stages of labor with Laura twitching nervously beside Carmilla all the way.  Honestly, the worst of the entire affair was Laura chewing her fingers bloody, and at one point Carmilla reached out and grasped the other girl’s hand tightly in her own.  She lowered it to Laura’s lap and they sat there quietly, fingers interlocked, taking comfort from the togetherness.  

 

Denise, silent all the way, gave no sign she noticed this new development other than an arched brow.  She was used to the strange behaviors of her head veterinarian and former riding student.

 

Mango gave a final push and the foal slid out behind her into a neat little wet heap.  Carmilla was on her feet at once, dragging the still form away, ripping away the protective sack covering the wet one.  The little body was stiff and cold, dead before it had even had the chance to experience the outside world.

 

Carmilla gestured for Laura to come by her side, and Mango lifted her head with an exhausted expression.  As the little filly’s eyes stared at her baby, who was no bigger than a large dog, you could see the recognition and knowing in them.  She made a small keening sound and then her head flopped back down to the earth.

 

Laura passed Carmilla without a word and went to sit by Mango’s head.  She lifted it, and placed it on her lap, with her fingers lightly tracing Mango’s jaw.  “It’s okay,” she whispered, fat tears running down her cheeks, “you’re okay.  I’m so sorry.  I’m so sorry.”  She repeated her apology over and over, as if the sheer weight of her sadness for the mare and her lost baby would make things better.

 

Carmilla wiped her hands on the soft cloth Denise handed her, and she stood up, her dark eyes studying Laura wordlessly.  Denise placed a hand on her shoulder, and she looked up to see the older woman’s eyes glassy with unshed tears.  Carmilla placed her hand over Denise’s for a long moment, before together they turned and walked away, leaving Laura and Mango to their shared grief.

 

* * *

 

 

It was a long evening after that.  Mango had risen after a few minutes and sniffed her stillborn foal for a while, gently nudging it as if she were encouraging it to stand.  After a few attempts, she wandered away, her expression blank and empty.  Laura followed her, found a soft brush in the tools Denise and Carmilla left, and just spent some time brushing Mango’s head, neck and shoulders.  The little horse stood quietly with her eyes closed and a hind foot cocked, and together they mourned and took comfort from one another.

 

After a bit, Carmilla returned with Jonas, the farm hand, and they took the baby away to bury.  They left Laura and Mango alone, showing respect and compassion.  The little mare had picked Laura to be her friend, and right now, it was a friend she needed.

 

Laura left Mango’s pen an hour later, retreating to her car to get out the latest book they were reading, and to check the time on her cell phone.  When she was it was already 4:51pm, she sent a text message to LaF canceling their dinner date.  She couldn’t leave Mango.  Not like this.

 

When she came back to Mango’s little paddock, she found Carmilla standing beside the little filly, her elegant fingers gently stroking her neck.  Laura came to a stop just outside the gate, letting her forearms rest upon it’s metal bars, and she watched with interest as Carmilla continued to stroke and croon softly to Mango.  She couldn’t make out what Carmilla was saying, but Mango leaned into her touch, her eyes soft and no longer worried.

 

“They heal faster than we do,” Laura observed.

 

Carmilla looked up, startled.  Then she nodded.  “Yes.  They do.  Mango understands, on some level, what happened to her baby and she has begun to move on.  She shouldn’t fall into a depression thanks to you.”

 

“Thanks to me?” Laura asked, a note of surprise in her voice.

 

“Yes.  You.  She has a bond with you.  She takes comfort in your presence.”

 

It was true.  Mango had lifted her head at the sound of Laura’s voice, and as if to accentuate Carmilla’s point, she nickered softly to Laura.  A soft smile touched Laura’s lips and she ran her hands through her chestnut hair, pulling it back into a messy bun, and Carmilla felt an odd surge of attraction to the other girl as a few tendrils of the warm ocher strands fell into Laura’s face.

 

The other girl tucked them behind her ear with a purse of her lips, and then she ran a hand lightly just under her neck, wiping away a few beads of sweat that had come from a day spent in the sun.  Carmilla’s attraction grew, and Mango turned her head to look at her out of one dark eye.   _ Easy, Tiger _ .  Her expression seemed to say.   _ That’s my human, y’know. _

Carmilla shook her head and smiled at Mango before Laura’s voice interrupted their little exchange.

 

“What? Did I do something funny?”

 

Carmilla looked back to Laura, a flush to her cheeks.  “N-no, no.  I was just thinking about something.”

 

“Oh,” Laura accepted her explanation without protest and opened the gate.  Making her way over to them, she rolled her sleeves up, revealing tanned skin dotted with a freckle here or there.  She was lithe and fit and her arms held just a hint of muscle when she flexed them as she used them.  

 

Carmilla felt that odd twinge again and looked away, over at the other paddock where the colts were.  “We never did give them hay or water.”

 

Laura followed her gaze as she came to a stop beside Carmilla.  “Yes, you’re right.  I can help you if you want.”

 

“No, it’s okay.” Carmilla said too quickly, “I don’t mind.  Here stay with Mango.  You can keep reading to her.  What are you reading to her anyway?” She trailed off, looking at the book in Laura’s hands.

 

It was Laura’s turn to look embarrassed.  “Horses for Dummies 101,” she said after a beat, revealing the bright yellow cover. “I figured it was a good place to start learning.”

 

Carmilla actually laughed this time.  “Oh my goodness,” she said after she finished chuckling, “it’s only funny because Mango knows all about being a horse.  She doesn’t need a ‘For Dummies’ book on it.”

 

Laura returned her giggle.  “Well, yeah, but I do.  She doesn’t mind, I don’t think.  Yesterday we read a chapter on how to tack up a horse and she got a little bit wide eyed.  I don’t think she realized she would have to wear a horse belt- I mean,  _ girth _ around her middle.  I don’t know if she’s going to like that part.”

 

“They don’t usually mind if you do it right,” Carmilla said reassuringly.

 

Laura nodded.  “Yeah, I’ve got a lot of practicing to do before Mango and I try.  I’m still wondering something though…”

 

“What’s that?”

 

“Where’s the chapter on painting their nails? I read about braiding their manes and picking their feet, but nothing about nail polish and I really want to learn to do Mango’s toes…”

 

Carmilla couldn’t stop laughing until long after she finished taking care of the colts.  Laura had been mortified when she explained that horses don’t get their nails painted.  She told Laura all about what the grooming stalls were for, and promised to show her how with Diablo again whenever she was ready.

 

It was getting dark when she saw Laura packing up to leave, heading toward the parking lot with her book and chair in tow.  She saw Carmilla approaching her own truck and she waved a wordless goodbye.

 

Just as Carmilla was prepared to get into her driver’s seat, something stopped her and she called to Laura.

 

“Would you like to maybe have dinner sometime?”

 

Laura stopped dead in her tracks.  She stiffened, but didn’t turn around.  For a second, Carmilla wasn’t sure if she had heard her clearly, or maybe she was thinking of a way to let her down easy.  Whatever the case, Carmilla very much wished life came with a rewind and redo button.  

 

Laura turned around, her hazel eyes filled with a questioning look. “You’re  _ married _ .” She was perfectly scandalized by the mere thought of going out to dinner with a married woman.

 

Carmilla looked down at her left hand on reflex.  The tiny gold wedding band winked back at her.  She looked up to see Laura’s expression darkening, and then suddenly her tiny feet were moving and she was flying toward Carmilla wearing what could only be called a thundercloud of indignation.

 

She stuck a finger out once she was close enough and poked Carmilla hard in the chest.  “I don’t know who you think you are,” she said hotly, “but you cannot ask me out on a terrible day like today, when I actually needed the confidence boost of such a thing…  _ and be married at the exact same time!  _  Because if that isn’t a total summation of my current state of affairs,  _ then I don’t know what is _ !” She huffed to accentuate her words and gave Carmilla one last hard poke before turning on her heel and marching back the way she had come.

 

Carmilla watched her go, almost afraid to call her back.  Her voice was trapped in her throat, the words stuck and Laura had almost reached her car before Carmilla finally spoke. “I’m not married.” Carmilla said softly.

 

“What?” Laura spun around immediately.  “Yes you are! You said you were. You have a  _ ring _ .” She said as if this was the most obvious conclusion to marriage that there could be.

 

“Well, I  _ am _ married,” Carmilla started and Laura huffed again and started to move but Carmilla finally got the words out.  “I mean I  _ was _ married.  I’m not anymore.”

 

Laura lost a little bit of her haughtiness.  “What do you mean?”

 

“She died.”  Carmilla said simply.

 

Oh.” Laura said after a second. “Oh.  _ Oh! _ Oh my god. I’m sorry.”

 

“It’s okay.” Carmilla said.  She was used to this.  Talk about the dead wife, and the next statement was always the same: I’m sorry. That’s horrible.  Poor thing.

 

She hated it.  It got real old over the years.

 

They stared at each other for a long moment.  It was a painfully awkward sixty seconds before Laura tried to recover whatever it was that brought Carmilla to asking her out.

 

“Yes.”

 

“What?” Carmilla’s expression was confused.

 

“Yes, I’ll go to dinner with you.” Laura repeated.

 

“Oh, I didn’t mean like a… a date or anything.”  She saw a hint of mortification start in Laura’s eyes and she quickly added.  “I mean, I just… I don’t date. It’s not anything to do with you. It’s everything to do with me.”

 

_ Oh nice, Carmilla.  Real nice _ .  She felt like slapping herself.  This was not going like she envisioned, but then again, she never thought she would be asking a girl out, getting poked super hard by said girl, and then taking back the entire thing in the world’s most awkward encounter of all time.

 

“I just, I just could use a friend.  I think we could be good friends.  Now that you like horses.” Carmilla finished lamely.  

 

_ And the award for the biggest loser goes to… Dr. Carmilla Karnstein! _

 

“Okay,” Laura said quietly.

 

Carmilla looked relieved.  “Really? I mean you don’t have to.  I’m pretty sure I’ve insulted you more in the past three minutes than I have in the past few weeks and that takes talent.”

 

Laura laughed.  “It’s okay.  I was the one who jumped to conclusions.”

 

“Okay. Well, when?”

 

“When what?”

 

“When do you want to go out?” Carmilla repeated.

 

“Oh! Well, whenever.  Tonight if you want.” Laura waved a hand nonchalantly.

 

“Tonight!” Carmilla was shocked.

 

“Yes, after all this I’m starved, and I don’t know about you, but I could use a drink.”

 

“I don’t drink.” Carmilla responded quickly.

 

“Oh, okay then.  No drinks.” Laura was beginning to want to slap herself after everything she said.  This was going great.

 

“Well you can, I don’t mind, I just don’t after… well, after my wife died I got a bit too comfortable with drinking and overworking myself and one of them had to stay and the other had to go… So no drinking.  Just a lot of working.”  

 

It was the most Carmilla had revealed about herself to… well, anyone since Ell died.  She wasn’t so sure why she trusted Laura so much, but like Mango, she just felt an irresistible pull to the other girl.

 

“Okay.  No worries.  Do you want to grab some food then?”

 

“Sure.  Where?”

 

“My friend owns a pub downtown.  Siobhan- they have the best shepherd’s pie on the planet.”

 

“Okay. I’ll follow you there?”

 

“Absolutely.”

 

Laura walked back to her Civic, her mind reeling.  What the fuck just happened even?

* * *

 

 

 

The pub was louder than Carmilla expected and more crowded.  They had let Laura in with barely a glance, and Carmilla had to admit she was impressed at how quickly they were sat at a table and a polite server approached them and took their drinks.  Laura just responded with a, ‘The usual’ and Carmilla ordered a water.  She made it a point to order nothing that could stain or otherwise ruin her outfit on a first date.

 

She shook herself.  _ This was not a date! _

 

The server returned with a gin and tonic and the water before whisking away to another table while promising to return for their orders.  Laura didn’t bother to open the menu and when Carmilla started to peer at hers, Laura placed a hand on top of the laminated cover.  “Trust me,” she said, “You want the Shepherd’s pie.  It’s heaven.”

 

“Okay,” Carmilla replied before sitting down her menu.  “I trust you.”

 

Laura smiled and sipped her drink. “Good.  At least you do about something.”

 

“You and horses are different.  You busted your head in hour one.”

 

“I’ll have you know I cleaned fourteen stalls before that!”

 

Carmilla laughed and relented. “Denise did say you are the best stall cleaner she’s ever had, and that’s a high compliment coming from her.”

 

Laura beamed. “Really? I enjoy it! It’s nice to take something dirty and turn it back to neat and clean with your own two hands.”

 

Carmilla nodded. “I completely agree.”

 

They were interrupted by the return of their waiter; he took down their order and then sped off again, his feet almost gliding across the waxed floor.

 

“They have good service here,” Carmilla observed.

 

“Yes.” Laura smiled. “My friend can be a bit… controlling.”

 

“Only about some things,” a voice broke into their conversation and Carmilla turned around to see a lithe dark-skinned woman staring down at them.  She had the coolest dark eyes, and an elegant air about her, and she held out her arms to Laura with a smile.  The faint Irish accent that touched her words added to her air of general attractiveness.

 

Laura stood up and hugged her happily.  “Mattie this is Carmilla, Carmilla this is Mattie.”

 

Carmilla stood and she and Mattie exchanged a firm handshake.  

 

“Nice to meet you, Carmilla,” Mattie purred. “It’s nice to see someone other than Danny with Laura.  Especially someone so…  _ alluring _ .”

 

Laura’s complexion took on a slightly pinkier color and her voice was a little higher than normal. “Stop that Mattie! Carmilla’s a friend of mine from that horse rescue I was telling you about…”

 

“Mango!” Mattie replied happily. “I love stories about Mango,” she beamed in Carmilla’s direction. “I keep telling Laura to take me to meet her, but she wants to make sure she can lead her on a horse leash first.”

 

“Lead rope,” Carmilla replied grudgingly.

 

“Hmm?” Mattie turned in her direction.

 

“Nothing, Mattie,” Laura broke in. “Have you seen LaF recently?”

 

“Yes, yes,” Mattie returned. “Sh-- _ they _ came in here with a lovely redhead.  Lola something was her name.”

 

“What?!”

 

“Lola Perry?”

 

Laura and Carmilla said at exactly the same time.

 

They turned to look at one another, eyes widening in surprise.

 

“Yes, yes that was her name.” Mattie nodded obliviously to Carmilla. “Lola Perry.”

 

“LaF finally got somewhere with that girl?” Laura said with surprise. “They didn’t mention anything to me about it.”

 

Carmilla was also shocked. “Perry never mentioned anyone to me at all.”

 

Mattie’s eyebrow arched.  “Maybe it’s a secret? But they didn’t seem to be hiding it… or anything really.”

 

“Gross!” Carmilla and Laura made equal sounds of disgust.

 

“Well, I’ve got to check on some tables and it seems I’ve done enough damage here…” Mattie strode away with a goodbye kiss to Laura’s cheek and a slight wave to Carmilla.

 

Both Laura and Carmilla sat back in their chairs with equally disgruntled expressions. 

 

“LaF could have told me if it was getting serious,” Laura said, a bit miffed.

 

“At least they told you something at all. Perry hasn’t said a damn word.”

 

“Maybe she didn’t want to upset you?” Laura tried to say helpfully.

 

“Maybe. Probably. I’m easily upset these days.” Carmilla sighed.

 

Laura reached across the table and squeezed her hand for a second. “Understandably so.”

 

Carmilla smiled. “Maybe.  But tragedies happen all the time. I’m not the first young widow.”

 

“That’s true,” Laura agreed. “I don’t know how I would handle it to be honest. I just went through a breakup, but I’m probably acting more dramatic about it than I should.”

 

She wanted to kick herself. LaF was always hounding her not to mention Danny on first dates!

 

But this wasn’t a date, remember?

 

“Is that this Danny person Mattie mentioned?” Carmilla asked curiously.

 

“Yes.” Laura admitted. “She was my first and last girlfriend. Ended messily about six months ago.  She cheated on me with one of my best friends.”

 

“Holy shit, that’s rough.”

 

“Yeah well the relationship was already over.  She was just trying to shoot it dead so we would both stop pretending it was alive and well.”

 

“Still, can’t be easy.  Especially with your best friend.  Are you guys still friends now?”

 

“Yes. He’s been my friend since elementary school so I kind of had to stay friends with him, I guess.”

 

Carmilla just nodded.  She wasn’t one to judge.  

 

Laura smiled and changed the subject.  “That’s the past though.  We should talk about something else, like apparently how our two mutual friends are dating.”

 

Carmilla laughed. “Perry isn’t just a friend. She’s like.. my sister.  We met through my wife, Ell.  They were like sisters and so I sort of inherited her after…”  She broke off, unable to finish.

 

Laura blew some air out of her lips. “Man, we aren’t good at staying off taboo subjects, are we?”

 

“No,” Carmilla agreed.  “We definitely are not!”

 

“Let’s talk about something safe.”

 

“Okay,” Carmilla said with a ghost of a smile on her lips. “Let me guess… You want to talk about Mango?”

 

“How ever did you know?”

 

They spent the rest of the evening discussing Mango’s training, the tragedy they experienced earlier that day, and planning for the future.  It was a nice evening and by the time it came for the pub to close, Carmilla had to admit she was sad to part with Laura.

 

Carmilla reached for the check but to her surprise Laura stopped her.  “Don’t worry about it,” she smiled, “Mattie always puts it on the house.  She’s another close friend.”  Laura dropped a ten dollar bill on the table for tip, and then gestured for them to walk out together.

 

They stood up and walked toward the door and Carmilla found herself quipping, “Well that’s a nice little set up you’ve got there.”

 

Laura turned to her with a mildly confused expression. “Hmm?”

 

“You can bring a girl here, order like a big shot, reach for the check and act like you’re paying it. Instant badassery on the first date.”

 

Laura laughed. “I never thought about it like that.”

 

“Oh sure,” Carmilla waved her away. “I bet you’ve never brought a girl here before.

 

Laura smiled. “Not until now.”

 

* * *

 

Thanks for all the love guys. -STG


End file.
